General Really Searching To Understand.

[cali-babe]

I am a wife of a recently diagnosed PTSD sufferer. I have spent the last 7 years thinking I was going crazy and finally managed to get him to the RIGHT doctor who laid out the diagnoses right away. I am on the verge of a divorce and I truly love this person but cannot continue with the emotional/verbal/ physical abuse. I am losing my very soul and who it is I have always stood for! He is not a vet nor seen combat we are both in law enforcement and see terrible things. I have read and read books but we have no support for family in my area. I am feeling tremedous guilt for calling it quits and really do still want to understand his suffering so I can help when I am able to. Does any of this make sense to anyone?

 

[southernsoftie]

I can't begin to truly understand what you have been through - I'm only at the start of a relationship with a someone with PTSD and questioning if I can handle it and all I can say is you must be a very strong person and from everything I've read about living with a partner with PTSD is that you should always look after yourself and don't feel like a failure if you find you can't live with the situation anymore.

 

[cali-babe]

Thank you for that, I truly appreciate it. It feels like such a lonely world when you don't understand how the mind works when its sick, how not to take it personal and get embroiled in the madness yourself. I'm in the businesses of fixing/ solving everyones problems so it is completely frustrating and confusing not to be able to apply rational thought to his behaviours and fix it.

 

[anthony]

Print it out and get him to read it... probably you too: [DLMURL]https://www.ptsdforum.org/c/threads/understanding-ptsd-by-anthony-parsons.13878/[/DLMURL]

The only problem with these situations is that people seek help when the crisis it usually beyond the return point. I think you will have a hard time with this one, and honestly, you both need to be realistic in what you want.

 

[ISupportHer]

CB,

Yes, sounds very difficult. Especially if still working and continuing to see all the worse in people, as those in the safety services see many days. There have been others in law enforcement that have posted. Perhaps a search will at least let you read other posts that will help you see that you are not alone in all this.

ISH

 

[cali-babe]

Thank you, I have printed out the document and will read this tonight. has anyone heard of a book relating to co dependency of cargivers? and or setting boundaries??