Sufferer Recent personal dx of PTSD, frontline trauma/tragedy worker for 7 yrs,Masters in Psych. Needing support

Ltk18

New Here
My sympathies. On the upside, this is a terrific opportunity for your own personal growth. That can be the focus away from the hopelessness that you feel and perhaps you can hold onto that as a glimmer of hope. At the end of all of this, with your own personal experience of trauma, you will be a kick ass helper for those suffering trauma. Your biggest job through your healing from my own personal experience is to look for a purpose in your own suffering. That will keep you waking up each morning and putting one foot in front of the other.

A few things that really helped to ground me during my healing:
1. Try if you can to think about who is important to you right now. For myself there were a couple of motivations.
a) I couldn't die because of the people who were attempting to help me. I couldn't leave them with the burden of thinking they didn't do the right thing by me.
b) I needed to help others in my position because most of the professionals that I was dealing with at the time were incompetent, egotistical, cold, and at times cruel. I wanted to provide better for others once I healed.
c) Try to think of someone who actually loved you during your life. Like really loved you. For me, it was my grandfather. He was only with me for 5 or so years, but his love for me was such a rock along the way and provided me with an example of how I needed to LOVE MYSELF when I was ready to do so.
d) Be careful of the drugs they give you. Research them carefully. Make sure their side effects are not worse than your symptoms.
e) Learn all you can about the nervous system. A great resource is Irene Lyon. She is damned good.
f) Feldenkrais is a great resource as well to help to resync the body mind split that occurs during trauma.
g) Learn to breathe. Properly. Not crazy breathing but boxed breathing to calm the nervous system. I used 5/5 and then graduated to 5/5/5/5. Always when I was feeling well. Never when I was f*cked up.
h) Have a crisis plan in place with trusted people to hold roles that they can handle. This is too much for most and it feels like we have no people around us at times. We do, they just can only handle small slivers.

2. Cathy O'Brien has a really good book out right now called PTSD: Time to Heal that is invaluable in understanding how to manage the thoughts/flashbacks/space cadet thinking that comes with PTSD.

3. Pete Walker is great as well at teaching what is going on and how we are affected by trauma.

4. Life will most likely get worse before it gets better. Find a safe place with few responsibilities and don't demand a lot of yourself.

5. Speak to yourself with kindness and compassion. Now is not the time to call yourself bad names in order to motivate yourself to 'get better'.

I think that is a good start for now. I hope it is helpful to you.

Safe journey.
Thank you so much for reaching out and taking time to share information and support. It means a great deal to me. It sounds like you are a pro when it comes to PTSD and you were right about things getting worse. I plan to follow your suggestions and I will look into the books you mentioned as well. Thanks again, I’m grateful!
 

Ltk18

New Here
My sympathies. On the upside, this is a terrific opportunity for your own personal growth. That can be the focus away from the hopelessness that you feel and perhaps you can hold onto that as a glimmer of hope. At the end of all of this, with your own personal experience of trauma, you will be a kick ass helper for those suffering trauma. Your biggest job through your healing from my own personal experience is to look for a purpose in your own suffering. That will keep you waking up each morning and putting one foot in front of the other.

A few things that really helped to ground me during my healing:
1. Try if you can to think about who is important to you right now. For myself there were a couple of motivations.
a) I couldn't die because of the people who were attempting to help me. I couldn't leave them with the burden of thinking they didn't do the right thing by me.
b) I needed to help others in my position because most of the professionals that I was dealing with at the time were incompetent, egotistical, cold, and at times cruel. I wanted to provide better for others once I healed.
c) Try to think of someone who actually loved you during your life. Like really loved you. For me, it was my grandfather. He was only with me for 5 or so years, but his love for me was such a rock along the way and provided me with an example of how I needed to LOVE MYSELF when I was ready to do so.
d) Be careful of the drugs they give you. Research them carefully. Make sure their side effects are not worse than your symptoms.
e) Learn all you can about the nervous system. A great resource is Irene Lyon. She is damned good.
f) Feldenkrais is a great resource as well to help to resync the body mind split that occurs during trauma.
g) Learn to breathe. Properly. Not crazy breathing but boxed breathing to calm the nervous system. I used 5/5 and then graduated to 5/5/5/5. Always when I was feeling well. Never when I was f*cked up.
h) Have a crisis plan in place with trusted people to hold roles that they can handle. This is too much for most and it feels like we have no people around us at times. We do, they just can only handle small slivers.

2. Cathy O'Brien has a really good book out right now called PTSD: Time to Heal that is invaluable in understanding how to manage the thoughts/flashbacks/space cadet thinking that comes with PTSD.

3. Pete Walker is great as well at teaching what is going on and how we are affected by trauma.

4. Life will most likely get worse before it gets better. Find a safe place with few responsibilities and don't demand a lot of yourself.

5. Speak to yourself with kindness and compassion. Now is not the time to call yourself bad names in order to motivate yourself to 'get better'.

I think that is a good start for now. I hope it is helpful to you.

Safe journey.
Thank you so much for reaching out and taking time to share information and support. It means a great deal to me. It sounds like you are a pro when it comes to PTSD and you were right about things getting worse. I plan to follow your suggestions and I will look into the books you mentioned as well.
There's a big, big, big difference in treating trauma in others and treating it in oneself. It's not worth beating yourself up about, if you can manage that, because it's just so entirely different.

I've had PTSD for about 15 years, and I'm a brand new grad student in MH Counseling. I've also run some groups for traumatized men. It turns out when I put that "helper" hat on, I am fully functional. But I absolutely cannot put that same hat on for myself. It's an entirely different hat, and it's taking a long time to get it to fit. (What an interesting idea for a study.) I can't imagine my experience is unique - every time I think I'm alone in some aspect of my trauma experience, I meet someone else who's going through the same thing.

So consider this a long-winded welcome. I hope you find some healing here.
Thank you for taking time to connect with me and share some insight. Much appreciated!
Thanks again, I’m grateful!
 
B

Branwarrior

A recent horrific personal experience altered my life by casting a formal diagnosis of PTSD upon me.
I am educated in psychology and social work and am well experienced in trauma and tragedy, yet this personal event has left me gasping for air and scrambling for venues of daily survival.
I am 110% cognizant of the multiple therapies developed and utilized to mitigate PTSD ailments, yet this suffering side of the fence has left me with feelings of complete terror, horror and hopelessness!
I have no one to reach out to that can relate, so this is a last ditch grasp at a straw, and at the very least, a learning opportunity to better understand how people suffering debilitating trauma are able to wake up to a new sunrise each and every morning.
Hi there dear friend you are going thru the worst time from trauma but believe me it won t last forever from.Time is a very important factor to recover from PTSD,during time u will learn to cope with the symptoms,my biggest struggle dealing with ptsd were intrusive thoughts at the beginning they were killing me inside, terrifying i can t describe with words how they made me feel,i was crying all the time and probably felt the most hopeless person my thoughts were so terrible and more i tried to stop them more they would pop up, after finding my second therapist everything changed he had the same character as me so it helped him understand me better .I just couldn't believe that a tough guy like me would could be put down to the knee's so easily, people that i was willing to die for gave up so easily on including my brother the started calling me a pussy that how come a real man like u would like a bitch and be depressed , i give a promise to them that i will comeback stronger than ever,joined police academy even tho i was on the medication( not using anymore) graduated proudly serving my country, looking forward to join special forces due to my physical and mental strength i gain thanks to PTSD
 

Ltk18

New Here
Hi there dear friend you are going thru the worst time from trauma but believe me it won t last forever from.Time is a very important factor to recover from PTSD,during time u will learn to cope with the symptoms,my biggest struggle dealing with ptsd were intrusive thoughts at the beginning they were killing me inside, terrifying i can t describe with words how they made me feel,i was crying all the time and probably felt the most hopeless person my thoughts were so terrible and more i tried to stop them more they would pop up, after finding my second therapist everything changed he had the same character as me so it helped him understand me better .I just couldn't believe that a tough guy like me would could be put down to the knee's so easily, people that i was willing to die for gave up so easily on including my brother the started calling me a pussy that how come a real man like u would like a bitch and be depressed , i give a promise to them that i will comeback stronger than ever,joined police academy even tho i was on the medication( not using anymore) graduated proudly serving my country, looking forward to join special forces due to my physical and mental strength i gain thanks to PTSD
Thank you so much for this message!
I am taken aback by the fact that we are complete strangers, yet I feel close to you in a very unique and exceptional way.
I was overwhelmed when I read what you had written to me! It’s as though you took the words right out of my heart and soul! You are the very first person that I have felt a profound connection to since my traumatic experience, 3 months ago! No one in my life has been able to understand or empathize, which just amplifies and perpetuates the pain and torture of the trauma and my PTSD!
I don’t know you at all (wish I did) but it is very encouraging to hear you are stronger than ever and are forging ahead with passion, and the physical/mental toughness to achieve the goals you have set for yourself. I have no idea which country you are from, but they are fortunate to have you standing strong for them and protecting them! I wish you continued strength and fortitude. Please keep in touch.
 
B

Branwarrior

A recent horrific personal experience altered my life by casting a formal diagnosis of PTSD upon me.
I am educated in psychology and social work and am well experienced in trauma and tragedy, yet this personal event has left me gasping for air and scrambling for venues of daily survival.
I am 110% cognizant of the multiple therapies developed and utilized to mitigate PTSD ailments, yet this suffering side of the fence has left me with feelings of complete terror, horror and hopelessness!
I have no one to reach out to that can relate, so this is a last ditch grasp at a straw, and at the very least, a learning opportunity to better understand how people suffering debilitating trauma are able to wake up to a new sunrise each and every morning.
Brother there are some very small things tha
affected a lot my ptsd like quitting alcohol, caffeine and sugar.Make sure that u eat nuts,fruits and fish because it would boost sterotine level.And also give your self time ptsd take at least 2 years to recover
 
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