Reported My Therapist

[City Slicker]

Thank you Confused Wingless. I appreciate your words and support very much.

 

[Friday]

I do that... Tell no one... When I feel really strongly about something, while being really fragile. One wrong word and I'll give it up.

 

[City Slicker]

I hear ya FridayJones. And it's sad because when we're feeling fragile it's the time that we most need to have that significant other, that friend, or intimate one, that is our soft place to land. In the meantime, we can be that for ourselves. And then maybe someday...?

 

[radicalgratitude]

I am new to this story, but I am so sorry you had a therapist who sexually assaulted/abused you! That is terrible, because it makes it hard to work with any therapist afterward (as you have experienced). :(

I hope that the investigation goes ok and that you don't feel like they are trying to undermine your experience.

 

[City Slicker]

Thank you for your reply radicalgratitude. I booked a new appointment with them and will stay busy and involved in other things until then.

 

[City Slicker]

One Hurdle Over - Initial Investigation of Sexual Abuse By Therapist.

This is an update.

There were two women investigators. They seemed very nice and careful. The questions were very personal and they asked some fairly specific questions related to the sexual contact.

I was able to get through the entire session talking matter of fact about what happened, with a few moments where I could feel shame reddening my face and I backed away from some of the more lurid detail.

But when we got to the end and they began thanking me for coming forward, telling me what happened to me was very serious and etc, it was only then that my throat tightened and the tears came. I pulled it together quickly and thanked them for being so careful and thorough.

It's interesting how much I thought I had forgotten but how much came back so quickly when they were asking their questions. This is the first time I have verbalized the details of this to anyone - there were a few moments afterwards that I would have welcomed a therapist to talk to but I know this isn't a path I will travel with a therapist. But I do appreciate all of you that have good relationships with your therapists.

Instead I went for a run until the feeling passed. It was a great run actually. Thank you to everyone for the support since I joined.

 

[joeylittle]

This is the first time I have verbalized the details of this to anyone

That's huge, right there. You should be very proud of yourself for what you did today.

(FYI, I merged your threads - it will make following your story easier if it's all in one place instead of spread out. I hope that's OK)

 

[City Slicker]

Thank you JoeyLittle for your support. Thank you also for putting my post into a cohesive thread. I appreciate this very much and it's totally OK.

 

[Tmt]

Can I just say. One of my a abusers was my therapist and I always thought I was quiet alone in this. Thank you! I recently charged mine as well. I hope things go well! I appreciate not feeling all alone out there.

 

[City Slicker]

Tmt, I hope you can see how strong you are to have taken the steps to charge your therapist. I hadn't even really considered it an option mostly because I thought I should just be able to accept that it happened and move on. I did for a long time until I realized how big, destructive and twisted it all was.

I am sending you lots of good thoughts for your process of charging your abuser/therapist. Regardless of the outcome, your abuser/therapist will know what they did was wrong and they did not get away with it. In the end, the simple fact that you spoke and told people means they did not get away with it.

You are not alone.

 

[City Slicker]

Next steps:
I am in the process of providing witnesses and documents for the charge against my old therapist. I have been able to provide some pictures and documents corroborating my story. It's been so long that most of what I had I destroyed so that I could get on with my life by wiping her out of it. But I have some evidence that I have just submitted.

Reading through some of the stuff I still have it's like it happened to someone else.

Some of the people that knew what she was doing were psychiatrists and psychologists yet they didn't intervene - perhaps they didn't intervene because they thought they would lose all contact with us maybe making the situation worse?? - looking back, a boundary is a boundary and no-one from back then told me what she was doing to me was wrong.

I am going through this solo - I quit a bad therapy situation in April feeling disgusted about therapy in general. This old therapist played a huge role in that. But I feel I can't compensate for how I view therapists anymore. A huge side effect from what old ex therapist did to me.

At some point I may tell my significant other but at the moment I feel somehow I need to go through this by myself so I haven't told anyone except to disclose it here. It is a heavy weight but this heavy lifting isn't anything I don't think I can handle. It's just kind of....lonely.

They sure do ask a lot of detailed questions. You know, I don't much care what a court or group of people from her licensing board will decide, I figure the end result is that she will know she didn't get away with it. I still hold a lot of shame and blame in my soul for what she did and I am feeling this process of going public and open with what she did and looking her in the face will give me some peace and ending.

Thanks for reading.

 

[ms spock]

Can I just say. One of my a abusers was my therapist and I always thought I was quiet alone in this. Thank you! I recently charged mine as well. I hope things go well! I appreciate not feeling all alone out there.

One of my friend's sisters committed suicide because she became pregnant to her psychiatrist. It is much more common than is talked about.