jtblack1337
New Here
Basically I had a pretty standard asian upbringing. Fast Forward to a Private College in a bad city (Cali) where I am on my own for the first time I got hit with traumatic incidences one after another total of 3 major and 2 minor times (minor being without weapons) Couldnt handle that sorta thing (Grades dropped as well) and transferred out to a different college in my home state (HI). (Going through various psychiatrists and therapists along the way and dropping them because i would "feel better" when I honestly just got better at hiding it)
Managed to not be able to study so dropped out after a year of escaping through video games. Tried to find work but got caught up with people that took advantage of me, didn't pay me, almost went homeless, scammed me out of cash etc, or just plain had flashbacks/events that made me not able to continue. Eventually now I'm 23 and trying to move back for school in an entirely new state/setting ( Las Vegas) and I'm wondering is there anything that can help?
I'm in a completely new place with a huge student loan weight (Cant qualify cause technically I can still work until an event triggers) and I'm just struggling to try to get this behind me but it doesn't seem to be getting better. The student loan piling up and numbers scare me, cant seem to work from past experiences and fear of events happening during the job and I wont be able to find anything able to pay it off unless I go back to school to finally get my degree but I don't know if I will be able to actually concentrate on schooling. I'm just constantly struggling trying to get myself out of this and be normal. I had a bright future, good grades good school and all that but now it all seems bleak and hopeless, I don't know how much longer I can pretend to be normal to those around me...
Managed to not be able to study so dropped out after a year of escaping through video games. Tried to find work but got caught up with people that took advantage of me, didn't pay me, almost went homeless, scammed me out of cash etc, or just plain had flashbacks/events that made me not able to continue. Eventually now I'm 23 and trying to move back for school in an entirely new state/setting ( Las Vegas) and I'm wondering is there anything that can help?
I'm in a completely new place with a huge student loan weight (Cant qualify cause technically I can still work until an event triggers) and I'm just struggling to try to get this behind me but it doesn't seem to be getting better. The student loan piling up and numbers scare me, cant seem to work from past experiences and fear of events happening during the job and I wont be able to find anything able to pay it off unless I go back to school to finally get my degree but I don't know if I will be able to actually concentrate on schooling. I'm just constantly struggling trying to get myself out of this and be normal. I had a bright future, good grades good school and all that but now it all seems bleak and hopeless, I don't know how much longer I can pretend to be normal to those around me...
