Self-hate

[Tinyflame]

I really relate to your post #106 shell. Thank you and I am so glad for you. :) :tup:

 

[maddog]

Your journey really, genuinely gives me hope Shell, and that's not an easy thing right now. Your grit and determination are blooming into amazing self growth, and nobody has made that happen except for you. You make me want to try harder, and do better, to beat my self hate.

Maddog

 

[Jenfa]

This may sound strange, but when those feelings start to surface for me, I try to envision myself as a little girl. Once I get a good picture of her and how hurt she is, then I, as an adult, go and take care of her like she were my daughter. It's like a daydream, but both sides of me get that big huge hug they need. I would have been a great Mom for me lmao but since that goes against all laws of nature, space, time etc., I guess I can just be her mother now. She still needs one, and I think I am ready to accept that she still needs one.

 

[Abstract]

Jenfa, sadly that backfires very badly for me but I can see the value.

Hit with another particularly bad bout of this stuff at present.

 

[AngelKeeperJ]

Thanks to all who replied back in 2013...

I've been blessed to have had self-hate recede far into the background, until lately. It is getting better, but now am in a situation that I caused by my STUPID desire to help people, and then they become too dependent on me. Most don't, but once in awhile, someone who is far more mentally ill than I am comes along, without me realizing it, and I end up here...hating that part of myself. Sometimes, I feel that when I get overly emotional, a good slap, or ten, will bring me down to calm. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Mostly...it doesn't.

I will get better...I will be okay...the self-hate is probably 80% gone. I hope to keep it that way......thanks for listening!