RubyBlue
Policy Enforcement
So I have a former sister in law that we’ve kinda gotten close, still rocky sometimes. I’m pretty much the only one she talks to or confides in which I’ve tried helping her to meet others so it’s not all on me but she has no interest. I feel she is deeply depressed and should honestly seek therapy but it’s not something she is willing to do. I can handle it for the most part.
Where it gets complicated is when her venting and confiding includes my brother and their custody issues over my niece. Right now a fight is brewing and I really, really, really don’t want to be a part of it. Yet he is venting to me and she’s doing the exact same thing. I get both sides and I have way too many of my own issues to be involved. But if I say that, if I say I don’t want to be in the middle or if I say I just can’t deal with that stuff right now- it makes them both upset and they both assume I’m supporting the other one and turning my back on each.
I love my niece to death, I would do anything for her. But she’s not my kid. I shouldn’t be put in the middle of their drama just because they can’t figure out how to communicate with each other. They are good about not fighting in front of her but that’s as far as it goes.
I’m too tired and have too much going on. But I don’t know how to set that boundary without them each thinking I’m betraying them.
Where it gets complicated is when her venting and confiding includes my brother and their custody issues over my niece. Right now a fight is brewing and I really, really, really don’t want to be a part of it. Yet he is venting to me and she’s doing the exact same thing. I get both sides and I have way too many of my own issues to be involved. But if I say that, if I say I don’t want to be in the middle or if I say I just can’t deal with that stuff right now- it makes them both upset and they both assume I’m supporting the other one and turning my back on each.
I love my niece to death, I would do anything for her. But she’s not my kid. I shouldn’t be put in the middle of their drama just because they can’t figure out how to communicate with each other. They are good about not fighting in front of her but that’s as far as it goes.
I’m too tired and have too much going on. But I don’t know how to set that boundary without them each thinking I’m betraying them.