Sex Dreams About Therapist

[Kubash16]

I definitely have trust issues, there’s no doubt about it. And I think our therapy relationship is at kind of a cusp for that. I just worry that he will feel like I’m accusing him of like thinking of doing it, I’m super embarrassed by the subject for some reason, and I am worried about the analysis part.

He doesn’t push me for details on trauma. But we talk about my dreams all the time and when we do he does push for each detail. So I’m a little worried he may want details on this and I really don’t want to dive that deep into lol.

 

[snowangel35]

It can be tough to discuss dreams but they are just dreams. What type of therapist is he? The dream could mean many things none of which being that you think he would do something like that to you and if he is a good therapist he will know that and open to discussing the potential underlying meanings of it. I had a similar dream before which involved my therapist hurting me. In no way did I ever think she would do that but after discussing it further came to the conclusion that it was about my trust issues. I felt somehow that she might hurt me emotionally and that she could and it was something that I was not consciously aware of until we discussed the dream. It could mean many things...maybe a fear of him being in control or hurting you or manipulating you. Hopefully discussing it will help you shed more light on it.

 

[Kubash16]

We did discuss the dream today. We did go into quite a bit of detail (icky). It lead into a discussion of possibly moving me to a different T to work through the abuse part of my history and then come back to him for the rest of it.

I don’t want to and it’s not really his ideal option so we are going to see how things go I guess.

I don’t know, to me the dream itself wasn’t that big of a deal. I know why the things in it happened the way they did, I know what caused me to have it that night and I’m totally fine being around him.

But he seemed pretty concerned about it. His thinking is he doesn’t want my brain associating abuse with therapy or vice versa or whatever.

We shall see how this goes I guess.

 

[snowangel35]

We did discuss the dream today. We did go into quite a bit of detail (icky). It lead into a discussion of possibly moving me to a different T to work through the abuse part of my history and then come back to him for the rest of it.

I don’t want to and it’s not really his ideal option so we are going to see how things go I guess.

I don’t know, to me the dream itself wasn’t that big of a deal. I know why the things in it happened the way they did, I know what caused me to have it that night and I’m totally fine being around him.

But he seemed pretty concerned about it. His thinking is he doesn’t want my brain associating abuse with therapy or vice versa or whatever.

We shall see how this goes I guess.

It seems a bit of strange response tto move you to another t based on a dream? But then again I don’t know the whole story or anything about you, your background or your therapy relationship.

 

[Wendell_R]

I understand that you don't want abuse associated with therapy, but for me, part of the deep trust of a therapeutic relationship is that I can talk about dreams or other things that come up in my head without fear of losing my therapist. I've had fears of getting in trouble or abandoned (which were my abuse issues), and we've talked about those things, and then I learn that these fears are not true in the present.

Good luck with seeing how it goes!

 

[Kubash16]

It seems a bit of strange response tto move you to another t based on a dream? But then again I don’t know the whole story or anything about you, your background or your therapy relationship.

Not too strange I don’t think. He’s worried any negative transference would affect how I perceive him and would affect the tenuous trust we’ve built.

But then he’s my first therapist so I’m not fully sure what’s suppose to happen.

I understand that you don't want abuse associated with therapy, but for me, part of the deep trust of a therapeutic relationship is that I can talk about dreams or other things that come up in my head without fear of losing my therapist. I've had fears of getting in trouble or abandoned (which were my abuse issues), and we've talked about those things, and then I learn that these fears are not true in the present.

Good luck with seeing how it goes!

Ya, this gets me. I do have a huge thought to absolutely not say anything if any more negative dreams happen. But I don’t know. I hope I’m strong enough to be honest but I don’t think I am.

 

[ILoveLife]

Uhm, so, sorry in advance and I'm not sure others agree with me. But this is pretty run of the mill trauma dream, it was your T but it could be any other person in that dream.

Seems like an odd situation, to be honest as a professional he should be able to handle negative transference such as trust issues of this kind. Like, it's perfectly natural for any person in your life to be labeled in your head as a rapist-in-potential, given what you've been through. As the professional, he should be able to handle this.
Him suggesting you deal with trauma with another T seems more of a way of him not dealing with it, instead of helping you deal with your trust issues.

Seems like he's making it a bigger deal than it has to be..

On this perspective I actually think it's good he's saying you should deal with trauma with another T who can handle that kind of transference. It happens, it's natural to happen, and trauma Ts should be equipped to deal with what happens in treatment. And this is part of treatment.

Just my thoughts on the matter, doesn't seem such a bad thing to switch Ts in my opinion.

 

[Kubash16]

I don’t know what to think about it, I’ll figure it out.

 

[Kubash16]

So the convo went something like this:

He brings up talking about the dream.

We do.

He asks how I’m feeling about it, what my thoughts are on what it represents.

I say that I probably triggered it myself and these certain elements make sense and it’s all good.

He says, I’m concerned that your dreams have moved me to a negative role. As your therapist I should be in a more neutral or supportive role. I don’t want your brain mixing up therapy with abuse. While we are doing EMDR our brains can make strange connections like that. So maybe it would be a good idea if you saw a female therapist for the abuse portion. That way hopefully she wouldn’t enter your dreams in a negative way.

I say, I really don’t want to change and I especially don’t want to change to a female. I explain why.

He shakes his head yes and says okay we can see how this goes then. I feel like we’ve made a lot a progress and have built a good rapport. I just need you to be absolutely open and honest about any further dreams of that nature.

We then moved on to other talk.

At the end we talked about me being a perfect fit for the equine therapy he does and he scheduled several sessions with me into March since there was a scheduling snafu this time.

 

[ILoveLife]

I just read your diary too, ok. Seems like he's just giving you the option of choice and not ditching the problem.

Like, he's showing you you have a choice between dealing with that transference or not. It's really up to you and he seems willing to continue on.

 

[Kubash16]

Ya I guess so. I’m just super insecure I guess.

 

[ILoveLife]

Naturally, though. It's tough to deal with it.

Hope you're not blaming yourself for your dreams :hug: That's like blaming yourself for having a working leg.