Hi member1100,
I think I may have been asked this by another poster on an earlier page in this thread,...I had forgotten about dreaming, but here was what I had posted then, about a year ago...
"In regards to dreams, I had very vivid dreams for weeks after the injection. I have theories on this, and how trauma memories are stored within the adreanaline "factory" created at the time of trauma. Based on my knowledge of EMDR therapy (eye movement desensitization and reprocessing), emotions need to "cross over" to the storage side of the brain to become neutralized. Every night when we sleep, our day's brain activity literally moves from one side of the brain to the other during REM sleep (while our eyes move quickly about), and this can be seen on functional MRI. I believe that the post-SGB dreams are the long-awaited final processing of trauma-related memories. At the very least, this theory help me get through many nights of very realistic dreaming and some oddly confused mornings. It has now stopped, and my trauma memories, as mentioned before, have all faded to "normal" levels. I have to try pretty hard to even recall some of them now.....which is a great relief. Today I am about 10 weeks post SGB."
It also possibly makes sense to me that dreams may be affected, especially flashback reveries, by depriving them of their adrenaline "fuel", but I cannot believe that it could be such a situation as to override the immense positive benefits that come with a successful SGB. Whatever dream changes I had, I quickly forgot about them once they had leveled off. It was not terribly bad, just much different for a little while.
Since re-traumatization, I have a return of chaotic and anxiety-ridden waking. Now as I open my eyes, my heart pounds and my thoughts go straight to chores of the day, and worry.
I am hoping that tomorrow morning will be the last time for this for a while, as I have the "booster" SGB injection around 10am.
My hope is, as katt so nicely put, to be "me" only much better again....calmer and more able to process info as it comes along in a slower and more comfortable way. As with katt, since the initial injection, it has become much clearer in terms of understanding not only what is happening around me, but understanding what is happening withing me. With the chaotic static noise of constant fight-or-flight cut off, all is "cleaner" and softer around the edges. It is much harder to be come overwhelmed. I also am still amazed at how my depression, with which I struggled for 35 years, seems to have vanished even despite re-traumatization. It had always been looming a short ways away, even in more stable times, but now it is like it has left my brain completely. I can still get very sad sometimes when it is "normal", but there is a huge difference between sadness and depression.
I will also remember noticing that everything seemed more beautiful, visually, as well. Not sure what caused that, except maybe just having the "thought space" available now in the mind to appreciate details, where prior it was consumed with survival tasks.
I will keep a daily journal of the events post-SGB this time, and will share them with this forum if there is interest if you care to follow along......