Relationship She decided to have a new life

southwest

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I finally met up with my ex after months of not seeing each other. I've posted in the past few months about everything that happened and our break up but long story short. My ex with past trauma was triggered while being in a relationship with me and pulled away and finally ended our relationship.

We finally met and she told me that she got it in her had that her moving to a new city and new job was now her chance at a new life. Unfortunately that didn't include me. She said she was surprised by her feelings and it just kept pulling her away from me. Now she's completely pulled herself away from any kind of romantic relationship for the last 4 months and focusing completely on what she wants.

It's definitely still extremely hard to have her just drop me like this. I was trying to support her in anyway I best could and loved her very much and still do. It's hard to move on to say the least. Especially when we hugged and she looked deep in my eyes.
 
Speaking as a sufferer, I can’t even begin to count how many times I did that during my worst years.

Unlike the old adage of ‘wherever you go, there you are’ IE your problems just come with you? I found the opposite to be very true. Picking up and starting over (often several times a year, I bought a whole helluva lot of began waffle makers, as I would often just walk away with what was on my back) let me practice at rebuilding my life; until I actually got good enough at it, to stay longer, leave better, take a vacation instead of leaving, create lasting relationships (some now going over 20 years), etc.

I come from an amazing family, & I didn’t speak to them -much less visit- for years. I walked away from friends, lovers, jobs, lives… over and over and over.

Most people don’t hit that extreme repetition, but it’s still a very common coping mechanism.

Which is the loooooong way to say? It’s not you.
 
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