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KwanYingirl
Diamond Member
Another joyous day in Jamaica!! Today was my sons wedding. I had my hair and makeup done and boy did I get compliments!!! I think it's due to the kickass false eyelashes I wore. I even danced at the reception. One more day and then back home.
I didn't do well yesterday. We had a wonderful catamaran ride out to a coral reef and snorkeled. Just fantastic. When we returned to the resort my son asked me to hang out by the pool. As I was explaining to him that I can't go into chlorinated water a ball came flying out of the pool and smacked me right on the nose. My son went ballistic and threatened the person he alleged threw the ball. We could not calm him down. He was intoxicated and this is behavior is very triggering to me. I just broke down and sobbed. I had to go to my room and I cried for an hour. My son sent my daughter to check on me. I was inconsolable. Most of you know my son struggled with dyslexia and related impulsivity in his teens. Back then there were holes in the walls and the faces of his friends from him flipping out. He's 33 now and o hadn't seen this in him since his college days. I guess it was a combo trigger, old feelings of not doing enough to calm his sorrows back then, and despair that I'm pretty sure he inherited my alcoholism. My anger was turned into myself. His goes out. Either way, it's not cool.
His friends got him back to his room and he passed out and slept all night. This is an inclusive resort and booze is free. It's amazing to me that there are not more conflicts between shitfaced, sun soaked blockheads. The Jamaicans are extremely kind and laid back. Of course when you leave the resort, there is abject poverty. We tip well because we know they struggle.
Anyway, my PTSD gets me even in the best of times. I mean, what are the f*cking odds that I would get hit by a ball? Ugh!
I didn't do well yesterday. We had a wonderful catamaran ride out to a coral reef and snorkeled. Just fantastic. When we returned to the resort my son asked me to hang out by the pool. As I was explaining to him that I can't go into chlorinated water a ball came flying out of the pool and smacked me right on the nose. My son went ballistic and threatened the person he alleged threw the ball. We could not calm him down. He was intoxicated and this is behavior is very triggering to me. I just broke down and sobbed. I had to go to my room and I cried for an hour. My son sent my daughter to check on me. I was inconsolable. Most of you know my son struggled with dyslexia and related impulsivity in his teens. Back then there were holes in the walls and the faces of his friends from him flipping out. He's 33 now and o hadn't seen this in him since his college days. I guess it was a combo trigger, old feelings of not doing enough to calm his sorrows back then, and despair that I'm pretty sure he inherited my alcoholism. My anger was turned into myself. His goes out. Either way, it's not cool.
His friends got him back to his room and he passed out and slept all night. This is an inclusive resort and booze is free. It's amazing to me that there are not more conflicts between shitfaced, sun soaked blockheads. The Jamaicans are extremely kind and laid back. Of course when you leave the resort, there is abject poverty. We tip well because we know they struggle.
Anyway, my PTSD gets me even in the best of times. I mean, what are the f*cking odds that I would get hit by a ball? Ugh!
