Spouses As Partners In Recovery?

[The Albatross]

I think that irrespective on "why" she is the way she is... I'd consider the lifestyle choice of living defensively and the affect that her decision has on the marriage. Defensive and fear based thinking ... presuming that her past abuse trumps her present and her marriage...well that attitude won't bode well for the longer term, but she may ensconce herself in it and defend it. Many do.

We are our choices and with those choices come consequences, trials, and difficulty. I hope you both can navigate them together.

 

[The Albatross]

probably should have been "effect" but thanks.