I am nearly 60 now. I was abused intermittently by my father from a very early age - maybe 4 or 5 - up until I told him to stop at the age of 14. By that time he was an alcoholic as well, and was a manipulative and controlling man. My poor mom couldn't cope - I was the youngest in a big family - and she simply ignored the issues and me, so there was a lot of neglect involved as well. I have had therapy over the years, mostly to cope with the guilt I felt about my reactions to the abuse. My siblings lived in fear and neglect, but were not sexually abused. Three suffer serious depression issues, one took his own life. OK - it sounds awful, like all these things do. I know all the stuff about it, and I do not waste my time in the futile search for a better past. However, at the moment, I am suffering severe nightmares again - I had them in my 20s and 30s and in phases at other times. These are proper night horrors, from which I struggle to wake. My wife is very understanding, but it puts a strain on us, especially as we both have stressful jobs as well - we're both teachers. I can do no more to 'come to terms' with the damage that man did, but what can I do about the nightmares? I need to sleep.