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Supermarkets

Well I just spent <5 mins in my local one for two items and it was so, so much busier than usual for this time of week. I bet it's Thanksgiving combined with the threat of snow on Wednesday.

People walking by on all sides, checkout taking too long and so being boxed in. I wasn't intending to be, but I'm probably done for the day now.
 
Hi, this is a big deal and I had really to struggle to get to where it was easy. It took a long time . I could barely do it at first and I had to use a food stamp card before they were easy in self checkout. If I forgot something I thought it was the end of the world . Not only that i was always horrified I’d get there without my wallet or list which I did on more than one occasion. In retrospect I was afraid of how I was going to feel if those things happened. It was so gradual I didn’t notice but it got easier . Plus in the beginning for me I couldn’t do simple things . I couldn’t add 2 and 2 and make it come out to 4.

Even now because I’ve continued to get better I am figuring out how to do stuff and it seems so elementary, but I know partially I made things impossible for myself. Maybe more than partially. But not volitionally . It’s a subconscious program of self defeat .

I shop at a club bjs. This made it easier because it’s a supermarket but it’s different. I almost never go in supermarkets because it’s still too difficult. It’s more hectic and crowded and I don’t know where everything is lol. I know my club as well or better than most of the employees. There are so many different kinds of everything in supermarkets. It’s overwhelming.

Sometimes when I’m feeling down I remember this, how hard it was .
 
Baby steps. Can you get some items without stress? Can you set yourself up for success by going in more often and getting only the items that don't cause stress - helping you realize that you are triggered only by certain items on the list? No idea if that is true or not for you but for me that worked.

I recall feeling trapped in lineups. Part of my trauma was being trapped so I had to really watch what I was doing - which lineup I engaged in. Have you figured out what it is about lineups or is it more about the stress of being in the store has affected you so you are really vulnerable by the time you get to the lineup?

I am very focused still on going shopping when there are few people in the store. SO MUCH easier for me. Best of luck working on this.
 

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