DID ??? talking to parts/ fragments whatever you want to call them

[7Cs]

I was explaining to my husband that sometimes when I need to find something out in my head I ask and wait for the answer to "bubble up". To me it's different from inner dialog in that I'm not actively thinking or working toward the answer. Sometimes it comes to me as a realization sometimes kind of a subdued voice, sometimes immediately and sometimes after a small wait.

He doesn't experience this.

Is that kind of like talking to your parts or fragments?


How else do you experience it?

 

[Arebas]

I've always been told that everyone has some form of internal dialogue. I never knew mine was any different until I started explaining things to my T and she began to ask about how my mind really worked. I can't be sure about anyone's thought process but if you feel that's not you answering that question, that it just comes out of someplace else, then I guess that's your parts talking to you. I know there's information in my brain that is not "mine" and I can only access it if another part lets me. I don't really talk to them, I think my thoughts and if there's a question that needs to be answered sometimes I "see it" in my mind. I've only actually heard someone else's voice inside twice and it was horribly scary for me. There's no way in hell I ever what to talk to them.

 

[7Cs]

I've only actually heard someone else's voice inside twice and it was horribly scary for me. There's no way in hell I ever what to talk to them.

I can't say it's completely not my voice. It's just different tone, quality and it's like it's distant. But still me. Just like I have an intrusive angry voice and one that wants to die. Me but not me. Thoughts in my head that I don't think they're mine but obviously they are.

It's confusing but I'm trying to embrace it and open myself to it instead of fighting it and walling it off.

 

[Arebas]

It is weird. Guess we can only embrace it, like you say. They're there for a reason and they have a purpose. Annoying as they can be sometimes. :cautious:

 

[whiteraven]

I have a mix of experiences. I have, over the years, learned to communicate in various ways with my insiders. We talk (as in with actual words - I can hear them speaking to me - I usually don't talk out loud, but I communicate it quietly and, I guess, sort of telepathically), I get visual information in dreams, and I learn things from feelings and thoughts that come up that I've come to recognize belong to someone else. We also write to each other and in journals or on the computer, and I learn things that way. When I first started hearing them it was definitely scary, but over time I've come to really cherish that kind of communication especially.

 

[Heritage]

I was explaining to my husband that sometimes when I need to find something out in my head I ask and wait f...

My wife and I are both survivors and so checking in with regressed ego states or younger parts is a common conversation between us...meaning my wife and I. I experience my parts as distinct emotions and types of thinking. My adult, present self is a systems thinker but most of my younger parts are linear thinkers/feelers. When events appear to be falling like dominoes to an inexorable and awful conclusion I know that I'm accessing a younger scared part of myself which has not fully integrated. When I find myself thinking in black or white terms or in always and never extremes that's another clue that a younger part of me is needing some attention. I respond back in a generally nonverbal way. I do also have a very insightful and wise child in there who is damn near psychic. This highly aware part of me provides insight via images and by directing my attention to specific elements of my current situation. I also know for certain that some of the input I receive from myself is coming from a over developed defense mechanism which is highly suspicious, close-minded, critical and self -destructive. When I start getting that input I know it's time to compare past and present to demonstrate that I'm actually safe now and that the world outside of my childhood experiences is a much brighter and more nurturing place. Thanks for the topic and for reading!

 

[mumstheword]

I'm not formally diagnosed with DID and maybe won't be but I'm pretty sure I'd cop at least a DD NOS. I've had my parts talk to me or through me but I only get impressions and things I recognise as coming from them, feelings, impressions, a certain perspective that isn't what I'd identify as mine. I don't really talk to them but I do feel affection for some of them and ambivalence toward some of them. They perplex me. I feel comforted I have them, because now that I've acknowledged that I do, I know most of them have my back. It's only one that I've recently become properly cognizant of that I think hates me, questions everything, blames me and is clearly disgusted by me. I think she is still relieved that there are some parts that even she likes. I have at least two parts that are contemptuous of any show of weakness and helplessness. I call some of them my "inner people" or parts, some are my inner child/children or teen parts.

 

[Hope4Now]

What you describe in the original post sounds more to me like "insight" or "intuitive" thinking. This can come from parts (most people have at least one intuitive part if they're willing to "tune in" to it). The thing is, all people are "multiple" in that the human mind is naturally multiple, even though the reigning view for eons has led us to believe otherwise. The most mentally robust people are aware of their parts and work with them. The movie Inside Out gives a kind of simplified version of this. But parts can be dissociated too...along a spectrum. When they're totally dissociated (e.g., in DID which I have), there can be big issues. Or when self-destructive or self-critical parts interfere, even if they're not totally dissociated, it can be a huge problem.

It's just different tone, quality and it's like it's distant. But still me. Just like I have an intrusive angry voice and one that wants to die. Me but not me. Thoughts in my head that I don't think they're mine but obviously they are.

This suggests that you're in touch with your parts. It is confusing and a bit scary, but it can be hugely helpful in your life too if you learn to listen and respond with an open mind and heart. Do stay open to it. Know that there are lots of us on this board doing "parts" work in various ways. But also--as you have discovered--many people in the world don't think this way and/or are not able to explain their own thinking processes. And when you talk to them about this stuff, it can make you feel weird and alienated.

 

[whiteraven]

It's only one that I've recently become properly cognizant of that I think hates me, questions everything, blames me and is clearly disgusted by me.

Oh I have one in particular that is like this. She hurts the body, also, any chance she gets. But we've discovered that she's actually a pretty strong protector, just in her own way. Still doesn't mean she isn't trouble.

We had another who was almost as bad as this one and, even though she is still pretty mean, she is more our ally now than anything else. She used to cut but doesn't anymore. Took a pretty long time to get her to come "over to our side" but we're so glad she did!

 

[mumstheword]

Oh I have one in particular that is like this. She hurts the body, also, any chance she gets. But we...

Mine is giving me a hard time at the moment. But I think she wants to make sure I'm for real and not deluding myself. She is wary of drama and hyperarousal, she wants to make sure we are not buying into trauma-induced cognitive distortion, which is fair enough.

We got a BPD diagnosis, by a shrink who saw us for one session, half an hour and decided that. But since then I've seen numerable doctors and psychologists who all discount that diagnosis, my questioning, doubting me part is saying, just now "are you sure you don't have bpd?" This is after both my partner of 7 years and my psychologist of about the same length of time, both stated just past week that I'm like the opposite of a borderline personality. So my part is kind of giving me hell at the moment.
She doesn't have a name, maybe she resents that.
I appreciate that she wants to make sure I'm not in the wrong, or deluding myself though. It just gets tiresome that she constantly double questions everything around ethical behaviour, What's real?, Am I seeing the big picture? Gave I forgot any important details? That sort of thing. But I think she means well. She dislikes drama, immensely. She resents me being symptomatic. She thinks I should "suck it up", be super controlled and never show vulnerability or be wrong or hurt. So she's a bit of a tough arse.

I'm glad to read yours is aligning nicely. I wasn't cognizant of any of this when I used to cut so I'm not sure what was going on at all when that was happening.

I guess I stopped that when I got an abusive partner (I was 16) who I had a lot of children with (7 all up and I got to raise them all, for at least most of their childhood and teens, some more than others) so I stopped and let him treat me badly instead, while I fought for life and sanity and to raise my babies.

 

[Ronin]

We tend to be more cutting through images/movement/core belief than a dialog, really, so not entirely applicable.

Used to be more dialog in times I was more functional, but it's just went to crap. These days it's more of a 'connection test, you still around buddy?' shots in the dark.

 

[Freemartin]

We tend to be more cutting through images/movement/core belief than a dialog, really, so not entirely appl...

I, too, had a period of moderately successful dialogue. Then I somehow lost that. I didn't understand what happened - why was it that my parts didn't function verbally anymore. Maybe it's related to functionality.

Nowadays me and my parts interact quite randomly using emotions, images, sounds etc. Meaning, they send me some not-so-cool images, voices of out-of-control screaming, feelings of fear and panic and whatnot, and I try to tell them that their stuff is severely outdated. Often with little to no success.

I think I need some better stategies. It's difficult, though, cause trying to communicate in more sophisticated ways only results in feelings of being fake. Like, trying to play with imaginary friends that don't cooperate. How lame is that!?