Talking To Therapist Vs. Talking To Friends

[katiekat]

When I talk to my friends or fiance about my trauma, I feel little emotion and don't get upset, but when I talk to my therapist I'm struggling to keep myself from dissociating. Does anyone else feel this way? Is this common? Or is it a trust thing maybe?

 

[Shady_99']

I go through the same thing, I'm not to sure if it's common or not

 

[Ellabella44]

yep, I dissociate, i talk in therapy from the direction that the topic is coming from, monday , got my angriest one to grieve. and admit that she feels grief... I wrote down this was safe place to do that.. therapist office... each piece needs to heal what they hold, where im stuck , why they are there, and im co conscious when it happens. not sure if its common thing , but thats how i see the whole thing and make sense of it.

 

[Cool Cat]

I just do not talk about friends about trauma, sometimes I've tried. I just always end up 'playing it down' a lot.

 

[katiekat]

I would love to hear more people respond to this thread if possible. I'm just feeling insecure about my reactions...

 

[Lucycat]

I think it is about how intune you are with your feelings at the time of talking. I rarely talk to anyone other than my T about my Trauma, but if I do it is like I am talking about someone else. I distance myself from it because I do not want people to see my inner distress, or look into my troubled soul.

It is completely different with T, because that is what he is there for, and I trust him. So when I am talking to him I allow the emotion in. I have spent most therapy sessions in tears - and we even laugh about that. I am not embarrassed or ashamed of who I am or what I am when I am with T. I can let down the protective shield and allow him to see in so that he can help me find the way.

 

[TonyG]

I haven't found friends or family that understands or has a clue what I am going through, they either think time heals all or as a co worker said I just need to snap out of it, medication has flat lined my emotions so I can talk to anyone about it, prior to that I was unable to talk about the trauma, writing about it made me cry, my psycholigist is the only one I have ever talked to in detail about my trauma.

 

[GrowingJoy]

I feel like people don't know what to say to me. I don't get the same sensitivity or validation from anyone else but my therapist. I often feel embarrassed that I said anything to friends or that they wish I would never bring it up. It's a part of my experience and something that I am re-exploring so that I can grow and change and feel less anxious.

It's like it's ok to talk about cancer or the death of someone but there is so much shame in talking about trauma, especially when it was at the hands of family. It makes me feel very isolated and alone.

 

[Tinyflame]

Me too @GrowingJoy . I feel very defective or undeserving or damaged or freakish.

 

[Kintsugi]

I experience the opposite effect.

The more likely I think my audience is to experience a lot of emotions upon hearing what I may have to say, the more difficult it is for me to talk about. I have always been somewhat flippant with Ts.

 

[GrowingJoy]

Thank you for your response @Junebug . This is my first time participating in an online forum and it's very comforting to see other people with similar experiences. I also feel quite freakish as it seems like my family is normal and I had to pretend that it was for so long, but there was so much there that was a problem. I have minimized it so much, even to therapists who have expressed how terrible it sounds. I am just now starting to accept the diagnosis of C-PTSD.

@Simply Simon, I can understand being flippant with T's, sometimes I feel like they are being too touchy feely. It can be really annoying.

 

[Tinyflame]

Welcome to you @GrowingJoy . (I love your name & sweet puppy btw. :) )

Oh yes, me too @GrowingJoy . I cannot tell the family (very small) I do have, but I totally understand how it grows & grows (like a monster under the bed) until it becomes impossible to minimize or deny. It was only really when it came to life or death could I no longer minimize it.

The beauty about this forum is not only so many kind souls here & exceptional moderation, but I find the topics, support & suggestions entirely applicable & relevant. I believe you may come to see (as I did immediately) that these things & feelings & beliefs are so common among us.

A cyber:hug: if that's ok. :hug: