I am now down to half my original anti-depressant dose. With medical and psychotherapeutic support I am able to make this journey.
It's not that I'm no longer depressed. It's not that things are no longer difficult. It's not that I no longer suffer from the sequelae of complex trauma that started very early in my life.
Rather, it's that I'm more able to manage the sadness, the emptiness, the grief for what I never had when growing up, and what I don't have now as a result.
It's a delicate process. It takes a lot of emotional - and physical - energy. It is also very precious. That I now feel safe enough to be with my feelings in a more conscious way.
The first week I dissociated much more than usual, and even lost short periods of time. But things are settling down now.
My GP envisages I will be on the lower dosage for some time now. I've been taking it for some years, and also have been depressed for a long time. But it's still a significant step forward - I'm the least medicated now than I've been in 5 years or so.
So I just wondered how everyone else managed with reducing medication dosage, how the process was for them.
And also, just to get some encouragement, really. :)
It's not that I'm no longer depressed. It's not that things are no longer difficult. It's not that I no longer suffer from the sequelae of complex trauma that started very early in my life.
Rather, it's that I'm more able to manage the sadness, the emptiness, the grief for what I never had when growing up, and what I don't have now as a result.
It's a delicate process. It takes a lot of emotional - and physical - energy. It is also very precious. That I now feel safe enough to be with my feelings in a more conscious way.
The first week I dissociated much more than usual, and even lost short periods of time. But things are settling down now.
My GP envisages I will be on the lower dosage for some time now. I've been taking it for some years, and also have been depressed for a long time. But it's still a significant step forward - I'm the least medicated now than I've been in 5 years or so.
So I just wondered how everyone else managed with reducing medication dosage, how the process was for them.
And also, just to get some encouragement, really. :)
