The Difference Between Guilt And Shame

[Deadman]

I was wondering about the difference between guilt and shame. People, including myself, use them pretty interchangeably. However, since I've really been trying to sort all this stuff out in my head while I'm still feeling competent.

I can across this interesting article - The Difference Between Shame and Guilt, and Why It Matters

The video is definitely worth watching. She is a very good speaker.

I think her take on the differences of shame between men and woman is really important for helping someone of either gender deal with PTSD related shame.

You can view her full TED Talk here - Listening to shame | Brené Brown

Damn, I still can't put links in. I guess if you are interested enough you can just google the bold text.

 

[Friday]

Listening to shame

 

[ChandraD]

I love Brene Brown. She is so bright and insightful. She breaks things down in a way that everyone can understand.

 

[Llith]

To me guilt is feeling responsibility for an action ( your fault for not ) in a negative way. You look back on it as a bad choice.

Shame is more of a humiliation where you feel embarrassed and disgusted by something about yourself or something that happened. But you don't have to feel responsible for it.

You don't need to feel guilty to feel shame. But they do often come together.

Now I shall watch the video xD ahahah interested in what she had to say!!

 

[Deleted member 33052]

This is a community filled with Brene Brown lovers! Thanks for sharing, Deadman! (I love your name, btw. On another forum I'm known as Death. :))

I finally discovered the difference last year, when, for the first time in my life, I stopped being driven by shame. Now, I seem to give myself plenty of reasons to feel guilty, but none to feel shame. :tup:

 

[The Albatross]

The Difference Between Guilt and Shame

Link Removed

 

[Hope4Now]

I love Brene Brown. Have watched the Ted talk a bunch of times and read her book. For me, I have to keep re-learning the difference between guilt and shame. I get it intellectually, but it doesn't always sink down deep where the real knowing has to happen for healing. There are times when it is clear to me the difference. But much of the time for me, guilt and shame are all entwined and I am unable to sort them out. It's like a maelstrom inside. If the issues are current ones, sometimes I can manage to communicate with myself and/or the other person and sort the stuff out. What's much more difficult is the issues from the past where my role in the messes is totally unclear to me and I feel both guilt and shame like a toxic sheath on my whole system. I wish there were some special body wash and elixir that could cleanse all the guilt and shame I carry so I could just start fresh in my life!

 

[ladee]

It helped me a lot to learn the difference between guilt and shame... and there is healthy shame and toxic shame.... same with guilt... I was able to go no contact with my family when that became clear for me..... thanks for the links !!