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The Hotel

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Rabecca

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I have memories of going to a hotel with my father. He dressed me up and put a camera on and then came the men. They would stop at the door pay my father and then come see me. They would do things to me on camera so they could have a copy to take home, they would rape me. Then my father would put me in the shower to get me ready for the next man. He started taking me to hotels when I was 8 and we went once a month until I was 14. When I was 9 when I started to fight back so my father would shoot me up with heroin to control me. I wonder if it was better that way. I got to go away in my head a lot easier.
 
Rabecca, i m speechless. Was your father mentally ill? What about your family? Your mom? where was she? i m really so sorry Rabecca. I absolutely respect you. i m sending you positive energy and wish you the best for the holidays
 
No, he was using her to make money so he could get more heroine. The hotel was likely a place where he met his "man" to buy his next supply, so it became expedient to suddenly make a bunch of cash to use to make the next buy. She was there.

This makes me so angry and sad. I really wish we had a way of monitoring children for this kind of activity and punishing and locking away the people who abuse children. It should be treated the same as murder, and it could be, if we had the tech to prove it. And we soon will and already do, and it's a matter of $ and the public insisting.
 
I'm sorry. I'm sorry your dad treated you like a piece of property to be sold like cattle. Im sorry you were bought to be used by dirty filthy men. You deserved so much better than that. So. So. Much better.
 
When I step out of the box and look at the little 3-4 year old girl I once was, it saddens me. I cant belive that she endure such horrbile ordeals and it makse me angry that any child would be put through so much. But Im still alive and breathing. When you look at yourself as a child it really puts things into perspective. Rabecca, thats horrbile what you went through, just remember, dont stay too long there, it will eat you up. Peace to you.
 
I had a friend who was sold from 4-8 years of age for her moms drug habbit. She had 12 alters. She worked hard and no longer switches completely, but it took years, and years of not onky therapy, but spiritual healing as well.
Thank you for sharing your story. your still alive, and on this site, so your getting better. It is inspiering to know that not only did you live, but your trying to get better. Thank you for this as today my body flashbacks are bad going back to 4 years old, but if you can hold on I can make it through today. your a strong amazing person to be alive, and I can make it through too. Thank you just by telling your story you help others heal from unbearable pain.
 
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