Yes indeed, those are all classic symptoms of codependency that I believe I have experienced most of my life (in an intimate relationship context anyways, not will family and friends, I think).
It's difficult to not want to reach out to someone you like (on a romantic tip) that is suffering from PTSD, perhaps one of the hardest situations I have ever encountered emotionally. Undoubtedly, although a significant portion of me desires to offer support in any capacity in the sincerest sense, a part of me simply wants a retort of any kind to know that the other is still thinking about me.
I think the latter is unrealistic, perhaps even insincere in such a context, and that is a difficult proposition to swallow for someone who generally considers themselves and their action altruistic.
I think I may be experienced some sense of fear, or perhaps more aptly, anxiety, perhaps even obsession. I've objectively and honestly never met anyone quite like her, and perhaps the only regret I will have, and I don't believe in having regrets, paradoxically, is not trying and never knowing what might have been, or where it could have gone.
There is a part of me that actually believes if that PTSD, and my own codependency issues were removed from the picture, at the very least, we could see where this relationship would naturally go, wether somewhere or nowhere is of little consequence. Having the knowledge that these mental issues are just that, issues, that are clearly effecting the dynamic of our friendship, and if absolved, a normal courtship in all likelihood would take place (I believe we clearly enjoy each others company and were beginning something, not ending it), is terribly frustrating and disappointing. And frankly, against all logic. The fact that we can't divorce ourselves from that relatively factual evidence basically just sucks. :)
It's like Bogart at the end of Casablanca, he lets her get on the plane, perhaps because its the right thing to do, but I often wonder if he regretted it the rest of his life.
Meh.
