BPD The link between ptsd and bpd

[Butterflywings]

I totally understand these feelings. Was misdiagnosed with BPD due to self harm even though I had a long standing (correct) diagnosis of bipolar and had developed PTSD due to my daughter and I nearly dying when she was born. Other than the self harm, I didn't even have any of the symptoms of BPD when I sought treatment! I wasn't angry about what happened (although I should have been and in the last few months after 12 YEARS I have finally got angry about what they did to my daughter and I and only because they nearly killed my younger daughter several months ago too and that was the final straw). I was just deeply depressed and traumatised. I didn't even develop dissociative symptoms until an assault a year after that.

I have since seen one of the top psychiatrists in the whole state where I live now, and she has said quite clearly I don't have BPD. I have complex PTSD from more the several PTSD inducing events around the few years after my daughter's birth.

But yeah, too many psychiatrists slap the label of BPD on anyone who self harms even if they have no other symptoms of BPD, or if their symptoms (such as dissociating) are specifically within the context of PTSD or bipolar (and if a symptom only occurs within an episode of something, it is not a personality disorder symptom).

 

[Deleted member 1860]

I wrote this post a long time ago, and left out the part where the diagnosing doctor put me on antidepressants which gave me rage (not just anger, but pure rage), and I think that added to his decision to diagnose me with borderline personality disorder. I have had similar reactions to subsequent attempts to take medications which affect my serotonin levels and now refuse all suggestions that I should take any such medications. No doctor since has diagnosed me with a personality disorder (and I have seen quite a few, and have had my current doctor for 5 years now).

My mind is now swimming in "what if I have a personality disorder?!?!" thoughts, but I am trying to put them to rest. I have obsessive thinking issues which don't help AT ALL! One jerk calls me one stupid name and I start to doubt everything. Ugh.

 

[Butterflywings]

Solara yes I had similar except for me SSRIs gave me severe anxiety (a known relatively common side effect for someone with bipolar actually). Unfortunately when I reported it, I was told I was making up the side effect for attention and that contribute to my misdiagnosis. Luckily I got a second opinion and was immediately given a week's worth of strong sedatives. They knew I had bipolar when they put me on SSRI, they knew I wasn't on a mood stabiliser, but then they wondered why I suffered medication induced anxiety/mania??? But anyway. Thankfully that's in the past. I was put on a mood stabiliser a few months later and when I'm not thrown by something that brings back my PTSD, it works well on it's own for preventing mania and usually prevents depression. Haven't had a full blown manic episode since starting on mood stabilisers (just occasional hypomanic episodes). It's just the depression that gets me. Had to start on an antidepressant a month ago but would never dare do that without a mood stabiliser on board.

They refused to change my diagnosis (the doctor who diagnosed me initially admitted he knew I didn't have borderline PD but made it clear he would not admit to his colleagues that he had misdiagnosed me - that was nothing compared to the actual abuse he put me through) and when I asked for a second opinion, I was told by one of his colleagues the first time he ever met me that "I've read your file, I've spoken to Dr [the abuser] and there is not a single thing you can say or do to change my opinion of you or change your diagnosis". So much for a second opinion.

Once I got out of that system, every single psych I've seen since has said I don't have a personality disorder and never did. One though that I saw thought it was schizoaffective disorder not bipolar because of my fear of psychiatrists - she believed I'd been mistreated but didn't believe the extent of the abuse I'd been through and thought my fear of male psychiatrists was paranoia when in reality it was just due to really bad experience with multiple male psychiatrists and my fear (while excessive) was normal for someone with my experiences and part of my PTSD. But other than her, all have said bipolar + PTSD. But schizoaffective disorder is very similar to bipolar anyway.

I do understand why you think the thoughts you said. I have struggled with that at my lowest points, but then I just read the descriptions and am reminded I really don't. Obsessive thinking is awful, but don't give it into it. *hugs*

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

They knew I had bipolar when they put me on SSRI, they knew I wasn't on a mood stabiliser,

That is terrible and dangerous!

 

[Deleted member 1860]

@Butterflywings,
That second doctor is an arse! He did NOT give you an unbiased second opinion. He simply reviewed your file, and while likely holding on to preconceived notions of borderline personality disorder, said he concurred. A true second opinion would involve going in as a blank slate and letting the doctor diagnose you from scratch. In my experience, too many doctors are willing to just take the word of another doctor and not make their own diagnosis.

 

[Butterflywings]

Solara exactly! That's why I went private a decade ago. Not that the public doctors ever listened to my private psych when I ended up in hospital. Didn't matter I'd seen her fortnightly for years and most of them were registrars and only meeting me for the first time - they'd rather take the word of the consultant who I said repeatedly had abused me. The jerk who said that to me was another consultant. Although I'll give him this, four years after he said that to me, he did half apologise for not listening to me about some things. Not fully though. At the time though it was enough to help me on my journey of recovery and to stay well for five years.

It's also why when I moved interstate I have told my treating team they cannot contact the public hospital I dealt with. They are welcome to contact my old psychiatrist who I saw for 8 years, they can contact the counsellor I was seeing (both who had slightly different opinions by the way, but I have no problem with professionals who have different opinions as long as they can justify why they believe someone has a particular problem). Actually basically the main difference is my old psychiatrist would not diagnose bipolar (only would diagnose major depressive disorder in relation to my depression) because she never saw me manic because I'd started on mood stabilisers just before I started seeing her and I've not had a full blown manic episode since then (only hypomanic ones, and I'd blow my appointments with her off when I was like that because I thought "oh I don't need to see someone anymore, I feel great" and only realise after it was over).

It really annoys me how many people will just take the word of someone else in mental health. When looking after someone, I don't judge them until I've spoken to them myself. Too many people get labelled too easy and then no one ever actually checks to see if the label is actually correct. Then again, physical health isn't much better. I had the same problem with a knee injury. Three GPs, and two specialists told me it was a sprain (first specialist referred me for a "second opinion" and the second specialist listened to what the first had said and not me, but thankfully referred me for an MRI just to shut me up and found out it was a lot worse than just a sprain - thankfully he's a better surgeon than he is a diagnostician).

 

[Old Dante]

For anyone struggling with PTSD. I can say tomorrow will be better.

As someone over 50 with BPD and diagnosed at 5. I've come to see BPD
as a very wide spectrum condition. At one end Bi Polar [ OCD ..normal..
depression..panic..PTSD..GID].

In retrospect stress events were related to changes in my place, everything had a place and moving
Things would increase my BPD. A set of lost keys or moved shoes could ruin the day. The idea of a backup set or wearing a different pair never came to mind. Only finding those "% $/^" shoes. Its funny if it didnt happen so much. Then sugar or anything with a sugar like alcohol, candy, ice cream, pizza. Cigarretts, soda. A natural organic diet or eating critter food as I use to refer to it. Will at reduce the
mood swings which for me is 80 percent. The other 20 percent of over thinking will probably always
be there but at least you'll open the curtains and smile.

 

[gertrude]

Hi all,

I have a new therapist who is going to completely re-diagnose me. I'm grateful to hopefully b...

I was misdiagnosed with bpd when being in an abusive relationship was misinterpreted. Other person regularly threatened to end relationship over small things/anger to keep me in line and that was put down as fear of abandonment and was told me I had no friends and I ended up believing it, as well of a lot of things. Shrinks basically deciding my responses to the abuse was me being bpd for no reason.
Therapy for it made it worse as i wasn't helped to acknowledge what I went through but to instead focus on ignoring the feeling and (kind of infuriating) concentrate on how my actions effect others (towards my abuser, hindering me to actually get out of relationship and heal).

My own experience, I don't have much positive experience about bpd. Its caused professionals to assume a lot because bpd is such a huge broad thing from voilent, raging, manipulation to very meek inward hurt - and all treated the same which is very unhelpful.
I've found ptsd and bpd treatment very different - ptsd treated as being a victim of something, bpd being victimising someone. But maybe I've had bad luck in profressionals treating me but I think bpd treatment should be treated to heal whatever's under there causing the problems.
People have mentioned a self harm being used as a toward bpd. I found bisexuality also used as 'identity confusion' marker which sad.

 

[Anarchy]

The judgemental attitude to being bi, is yet another reminder of the frequent abuse of psychiatry, as a way to falsely medicalise social control.

Marsha linehan attacks the perjoratives terms, such as manipulative, needy, annoying
She points out that most people with BPD, don't have the interpersonal skills to be manipulative. That someone with uncontrolled pain from a physical complaint, or anguish from say a recent bereavement, would also appear "needy".

 

[Sideways]

@Anarchy - Yes!!!

There are so many things about BPD ("Manipulative Bitch Syndrome" as I've heard it's called!) that are misunderstood. And some of it's really basic.

Eg. People see "acting out" written in your chart, and they think "great, an adult having a childish tantrum". 'Acting out', in psycho-speak, is actually a term to describe behaviours, like self-harm, where a person is finding dysfunctional behaviours (like cutting) to express their emotional hurt, because they struggle with knowing how to express it in healthier ways. When a person with BPD cuts themselves, it's seen as attention seeking, when actually it's just the only way they know how to express & cope with their immense inner distress. If you see someone with cuts, that's how much they're hurting.

There are so many levels, just like that, where BPD is misunderstood. I've been disgnosed with C-PTSD and 'Borderline Traits'. Hate the label. But when I started to understand what it was actually saying about me, and why I have such difficulty with interpersonal relationships, I decided to hang onto the label anyway.

For me, that decision, to accept I have BPD traits, was a complete game changer. I understand why I act the way I do with other people, the fears that are underlying that behaviour, and best of all, crucially, it's helped me distinguish between when I'm having a DID switch, and when I'm having a BPD personality malfunction...the differences between those two can be incredibly subtle, but if you recognise them, you learn how to manage them differently and more effectively.

The label & the stigma is mind-blowing with BPD, but personally, accepting I've got bits of BPD going on has been incredibly helpful.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

She points out that most people with BPD, don't have the interpersonal skills to be manipulative.

If I could say that 10 million times I would!!!

BPD was my first and a very fast diagnosis and would have no clue how to manipulate someone on purpose if I tried!

PTSD dignosis came later, about 2 yrs later GAD was first and then PTSD was soon after.

BPDers, or at least me, feels every emotions on an extreme level and havent a clue how to regulate them until self taught with DBT anyway.

Mix that with "everyone is gonna hurt me" thoughts and you have a person always on the defense and not knowing how to regulate all the emotions they are feeling. It comes across wrong.

Im lucky to have been able to go somewhat through the DBT book and I think my "defense posture" has settled a ton.

 

[iamexisisting-z.l]

Haven't had much time to read through everything as yet but I'm s newly diagnosed PTSD and * drum roll * emotionally instability a polite way of saying bpd.
I to don't feel it's something I have but have traits of although my Mr upon googling is adamant I do rather than not noticing I just have traits. I even handed him a loving someone with PTSD book to which he may have just thrown out the window than reluctantly taking it away. In his world he feels a bpd is more suited to understanding me which I think is b.s.
I've told Mr and thought long enough to myself thinking it didn't sit right and wouldn't anyone be " emotionally unstable " having gone through a trauma. The hardest part of being diagnosed with BPD is that denying you have it is a trait. Ludicrous.
The physiatrist put me on anti phycotics which I've refused to take, I totally agree that this needs far better understanding because even without trauma you have children growing up who are naturally hyper sensitive and hyper vigilant and if they never go through trauma are they then excluded from bpd.
I think we all know in ourselves who we are more than the prosseionals in some regards, I will speak to my T next week and let you know any further info. I'm dragging the Mr to get him to try and understand.
Sorry for any typ I'm on my phone x