@Casey_03 One step at a time.
In general, we cannot stand FOR something if we don't understand what we stand AGAINST. It takes a long time to go from choosing to play your assigned role in society, to recognizing your role, to recognizing what's detrimental about it (especially where it is hurting others but not hurting you), to deciding NOT to play your assigned role, to figuring out what you will do instead, then standing up for what you're doing and encouraging others to seek a positive path that suits their individual lives as well.
There's a place in that sequence where anger assists in rebellion, and a place where anger assists in defying the system, and a place where anger assists in overcoming the fear of standing up to friends and standing out in society. Not everyone will need anger for these things, but it does help fuel one's activism.
Real change will take generations of teaching children that independence is necessary for interdependence to work. Co-dependence destroys cooperation, in society and in families and friends. There are so many areas where domination is destroying society. It doesn't matter which area you choose to focus on, just so long as you do seek to quell the domineering efforts of others. One thing that we must do together, consistently, is to stand up for others when they're being silenced for speaking out against injustices they've experienced and are experiencing.
Some people think to themselves, "I'll do something when it gets bad enough. It's just not that bad, yet. I'd feel strange making a big deal about my situation when it's not even that bad." Those same people think to themselves, "Wow, that's just too much! I can't fix all that! The problem is everywhere! I just need to make sure I'm okay. I need to stay safe." They alternate between these two attitudes as needed... you know what breaks them free? Anger.
We have to start somewhere when we seek to take back our lives from domineering people. When we set ourselves free, we are helping other people. And, when we are free, we will be able to more directly involve ourselves in helping others.
For me personally, I have thought about helping in a women's shelter, but I have opportunities to help women who are not so desperate yet and I feel more qualified to help them. I am also putting together my own group of women, comprised of many different backgrounds. They are not women seeking help. They are women seeking to help others and make a difference in our community. I think being a part of the group is helpful for each of us, even if we only help ourselves. Still, there are activists in the group and some who are willing to run for office in our community! I hope we will become a close group of women who include and value varied perspectives of life. I'm excited about the group's diversity...even if it doesn't include men. :) I've also taken a volunteer position where I can help my local school system. There are a couple more men than women in that group. I don't intend to censor my life story for them. If there is an opportunity to discuss child sexual abuse, rape, abortion, contraception, healthy sex lives, menstruation etc... I will speak up about my perspective and I will not be shamed, because my experiences and my understanding shapes my perspective, just the same as their perspective is shaped. I will ask questions and allow people's perspectives to change my mind, and I hope that it will set a good example so others will listen to me and allow my perspective to change their minds. This is vital if we are going to move from being Red vs. Blue, Conservative vs. Liberal, Men vs. Women, Religious vs. Atheist...and recognize that all of those labels seek to distinguish people who are trying to solve societal problems from other people who are trying to solve societal problems. Using the labels isn't a shortcut to understanding. Having the conversation, long though it may be, is actually easier than bashing our heads against the labels that infuriate us.
So anyway, that's where I'm at today. And, anger is still fueling my fire. I hope I can infuriate some more women (and men) and get them to become active, politically and culturally. I find it much less infuriating, personally, to see each person on their own path. I don't know where they're headed, but I can find out if their path is crossing mine or headed in a similar direction...and then, we can help each other along. If they're not near my path, then I can just leave them alone to go their own way. I don't have to force them to join me. That used to be so important to me. I think it was a matter of feeling vulnerable alone. I wanted the security that comes from being validated by others, even though I also wanted to break free of the confinement of being defined by others. I found freedom for myself by offering it to others.
