They Just Don't Get It! My Family's View of PTSD

[morgan]

Thanx everyone for your insight and support. My money should be coming this spring. I've been here over two years and lived through it but, it's only recently that I realized that my abuse was one of my traumas. I started having nightmares about it and BAM it hit me... mine was not a normal childhood! DUH!

My parents don't actually know that the abuse is part of my PTSD cause I just figured it out myself. Guess I'm a little slow on the uptake, huh? The funny thing is, my psychiatrist knew but I argued with her that things were fine between me and my mom (compared to what they used to be, they are fine). She certainly doesn't beat me anymore. I'd say that's a plus!:rolleyes:

Anyway, I just wanted to say thanx and don't worry too much about me... I'm hangin' in there!:wink:

Take care all, Morgan

 

[llama2]

Morgan,
I feel exactly like you do, and I live in a situation very similar to yours. For me I would always want my family to understand what's going on inside me, but I now believe they never will understand. To me it seems like they are sadistically pressing my buttons to make it worse. The, "all people have anxiety just like yours" shit is just too much to handle, because we know, or I know, what anxiety was like before my last almost fatal trauma, and the anxiety + + + + that I live with now is a whole different world. Talking to other survivors and my therapist is what gives me relief and trying to minimise my contact in all ways with my family is very important. I'm really sorry that you live in the same world that I live in; I'm sorry that this has happened to you.
Larry

 

[Grama-Herc]

Morgan.

Family? Everybody has one,right? I have always bragged about how caring and understanding my mom is about my PTSD and other issues. But there is one area that she refuses to accept or admit is not normal. Her phrase is "Everybody gets forgetful. I don't remember lots of things."

As some of you know my life is a blank. I rememer basically nothing untill about age 23. Stuff is beginning to come back, but when I joined the forum my mind was fairly blank. She(mom) absolutely refuses to accept this part of my illness. I have finally learned that it is best to avoid this issue with her.

So as you can see I do know what you are going through. All I can say is to really try to find another way to express your feelings to them without giving up your right to say what you need to. If that makes any sense.

Sometimes I tell mom that I'm not feeling well today, must be my meds. Sometimes they upset my system--just a side affect. I hate telling her a lie, but it keeps the peace and yet she thinks she understands and no hurt feelings. Then I come here and rant and rave. Works pretty well.

 

[pastrychefarmywife]

hi morgan, i am sorry you are going thru this. would it help them maybe to get them some books on ptsd? they could read it and be more informed about how you may be feeling? I don't have ptsd, but my husband does, and i am on here to read and understand everyone and get a better insight. I want to say thank you for letting me into your world. it helps me understand a little better with my hubby.

 

[morgan]

They say they don't read those kind of books. They really feel that they've learned all they need to know. They're not too interested in expanding their knowledge on the subject. That is why it's so frustrating for me. They think they're supporting me enough just letting me live here. They have some patience with me but it only goes so far.

Hey what the hell? Some support is better than none at all right?

Morgan

 

[Grama-Herc]

Morgan

Beats a box under the interstate over pass, sometimes. I've been trying for 11 years to get mom to accept this amnesia thing and she simply will not change her opinion. So I dump it all on you guys.

I'm not saying to give up, But, you know their reaction so find another reason why you are so pissy and give that one to them. It works, I've been doing it for years. I'll be glad to share some of the better excuses with you if you want.

I hate lieing to mom but it keeps the peace and less stress on me

 

[chrissym]

My husband did the same thing to me today

It is so funny to read this today because not a half hour ago I was out of control and crying to my husband on the phone and right after i said i was out of my meds, he says "there really isn't any reason to be upset" I swear, if I could have I would have strangled him through the phone. Other people just don't get it. I'm venting myself sorry/Chrissy

 

[morgan]

Last night I was told to "get over it" and when I said it doesn't work that way, she said "get over it" again! I just said "I wish I could."

 

[Grama-Herc]

Morgan

They are obviously not going to understand your circumstances and conditions. If it were me, I would simply not respond to them when they make their uneducated statements. I mean no insult to you family. They just simply do not understand the intensity of our PTSD, and it's various quirks. I've tryed to explain it, can't just simply can't put into words how this shit feels.

A simple response to them could be something like "Yea, I know" Then leave it at that.
Just a suggestion, hope it helps. Try it--can't hurt Right