they say life is too short for regrets

[emily1890]

but my life is full of them

I think I would need an entire new lifetime to correct everything that is wrong, and even then, I'd be pushing it

is anyone else struggling with a life of regret, and how do you move forward knowing that your entire life is just based on regrets and mistakes

 

[SophieBernstein]

Honestly, my usual form of overcoming these situations is forgetting it until the came back to my mind and them I get depressed. Sorry...

 

[Friday]

I’ve been told a life lived without regret is a life lived without passion, or the ability to learn, and become better than you are.

Doesn’t make it any less painful.

Nor, I think, would going back and doing things differently clear the board of mistakes. I’d simply make different mistakes. Have different regrets.

 

[Movingforward10]

I think it's how we hold regret.

I don't feel I have a lifetime of regret as I made concuois decisions to do some things differently, which has led to a lot of healing. Like stopping using drugs 19 years ago.

But I regretted bitterly things I did prior to that time. But seeing it through another lens:
Decisions made through surviving abuse
Decisions made whilst triggered
Decisions made with the resources available to me at the time.
Etc etc
Putting a self compassionate context onto the situation helps.

And then taking responsibility now and learning from past behaviours and trying to be a better person now.

(I say all this whilst grappling regret from something I did on Thursday! So thank you for this thread as this now helps me with that. )

 

[Nevermore]

Regrets and mistakes ):
I’ve never understood those people that say they’ll die without any regrets. I put them in the same basket as people who say they’ve never hurt anyone.
Either you’ve never really lived or you haven’t thought about it enough!!
I think the trick is to just keep going with the lessons learned and the pain of mistakes and let it all inform you so at least you can make different mistakes and not the same ones over and over agsin!!
That’s how we get to be better people, I believe…
We can only live forward not backwards.
I wish you peace. You are sooooo not alone

 

[Freddyt]

I’ve been told a life lived without regret is a life lived without passion, or the ability to learn, and become better than you are.

It's like everything in life - if you hang on to it and obsess over it - its bad. Yes I have regrets in life. No I don't have a list I read everyday.

One of my favorites is "Experience is what you got when you thought you were getting something else" So re-frame making mistakes as gaining experience.......

 

[arfie]

i'll add my voice to @Friday 's notion that a life lived without regret is a life lived without passion. living life to the fullest is guaranteed disappointments but i'd rather deal with disappointment that personal apathy.

i reframe my regrets as opportunities to make amends and/or set goals. example 1) i regret having been born into a life of child prostitution. amends: ply therapy tools here. i amend the regret with healing action. example 2) i regret not learning a second language. i signed up for a language immersion course.