Thinking Of Quitting Therapy...

[Pencil]

but now feeling like a failure. I desperately want to deal with the past but doing so makes me incredibly unwell so it's not safe to do so. :'( Frustrating! I knew when I 1st started seeing her there was a large possibility it would trigger me too much and I'd have to stop. I just didn't expect it to happen, especially when I've hardly disclosed anything to her. Urgh! Not fair!

Maggiemay, I can really identify with this!

 

[Maggiemay]

Glad I'm not alone *huggles* xxx

 

[Maggiemay]

So, I had appt this AM after 2 weeks off. Talked a lot about how difficult things have been. Also talked a lot about strategies. It appears I already have quite a few, but they're a little hit and miss and I need to put them in place earlier. ..

 

[Abstract]

Maggie,

I will come back at some point to answer more fully hopefully but in the mean time wanted to say a couple of things. I think a lot of it can be about learning to use coping skills and strategies when we need them. Sometimes we don't have them but even having them is only part of the answer. The rest is about practice and practice and practice. And often what works seems so ridiculously simple that there can be resistance to doing what we need to do.

I agree with Hashi said about charity support. Ideally you don't want time limited as I know how hard that is. :(

Can you push and fight for a dialectical behaviour therapy course? I do know that they are available here now and having the Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) diagnoses should help you open that door as it seems near impossible accessing DBT without it. Apologies if I have missed it and you have discussed this here already.

Alternatively there seem to be a lot of mindfulness courses popping up and here and there that may be worth considering.

The last thing I wanted to say is that having complex and demanding issues is not the same as there being no hope. I don't believe that for one minute. I truly believe you can develop a fulfilling life and find much healing.

 

[Maggiemay]

Thanks Abstract :)

DBT not been mentioned, although Mentalisation beased therapy has been. 7yrs ago I spent nearly 2yrs in a Therapeutic Community which I found incredibly helpful. But, apparently my needs are not now acute enough and too specific to go back there. I just want to be ok and living my life. :'( I'm spending my whole time exhausted and sleeping at the mo - I'm 28, this isn't the way it should be...

Because I'm not low and depressed, I feel people aren't taking me seriously as I come across as appearing well. Also, having insight into my condition means people wrongly presume I am coping. Sigh.

A day free of fatigue, flashbacks, black outs, panic attacks, seizures etc is a novelty... Just because I'm working, it doesn't mean I'm fixed...