Too anxious to apply for jobs....

[SeekingAfrica]

Yes, I know this it the easy part, I can send online applications...But I've been in more anxious state the last months and even that is really hard. A friend of mine will help(she offered we work at the same time so that I can share if I'm nervous when applying or whatever- keeping ourselves accountable). So I was feeling better about that. But this week has been a week of talking about work and my future with more friends it seems.

On one hand, I'm glad to finally share more...but on the other it ended up exhausting, for one. And also different people react differently and one friend made me feel worse. Not out of bad feeling, but she is just practical. And she made me feel like I should just apply for this and this work...it's hard explaining to her how even applying is too much for me right now(although of course I'm pushing myself to do it, because of course, I still need to pay bills).

So now I feel like a loser for not having my health together and even worse for finding job applications so stressful. But weirdly motivated and more appreciative of what my other friend is doing. But all this talking about future and the next 6 months or a year when for few months I've barely been able to plan even a day forward is exhausting and now I'm shaking and I can't shake off this fear- what if I choke at applications? What if in 6 months I'm exactly where I started right now? And that just makes me feel like any application will make me want to throw up again, like I've felt before...

Any tips on how to turn around that fear? To find better work I need to apply more than once and if I feel like this every time it will make it much harder.

 

[littleoc]

The first step you’ve already done, identify it. :) Maybe looking into it with a therapist could provide even more insight.

You’re worrying largely about making a wrong move, maybe? Or maybe not, but as you fear being in the same place then as now, keep in mind that you’re doing what you in order to help prevent that. And, it’s not a worse-case scenario. It might feel like it. But you’re adaptable and have survived so much. You can survive this as well.

Sounds like you’ve got a lot of anxiety in general that’s making this overwhelming, so try to praise yourselves for even trying. That’s huge. And try to find some coping mechanisms to help destress.

When I do job applications, I either power through in five seconds, or I do a little bit, take a fifteen minute de-stress break, and go again.

Good luck

 

[msjanetxtreme]

I remember feeling something similar to what you posted and asking very similar questions. My mindset was not conducive to doing effective job searching because I was too anxious. I'd panic, then end up dissociating which made things worse. I'd be too exhausted and spaced out to do anything like send out applications.

I found this blog really helpful for work advice and job search tips Ask a Manager

Personally, I kept a log on xls of places that I applied, dates, where I was in the process so I could see how many places that I applied. It's easy to feel like I didn't do anything when really, I had applied to a bunch of places. I usually set a goal each day that I could manage. Maybe that was write a paragraph of a cover letter. Maybe that was apply to a job or three.

I was so terrified of just the prospect of interviewing that the application process freaked me out. I didn't even have an interview yet! If I could do it again, I'd say to myself "Let's focus on the present moment. I'm only going to think about writing this sentence in the cover letter" and then the next thing, and then the next thing. Eventually, I'd get to the end of the letter.

Also helped me to make a list of what was in my control and what wasn't. I could control the number of applications that I sent out and how much I prepped for interviews. I couldn't control who offered me interviews or whether employers made me an offer. I chose to focus on what I could control and tried so so SO hard not to focus on what I couldn't.

I hope this helps.