Anxious and unhappy with "doing"

whiteraven

MyPTSD Pro
s it possible to not necessarily back off from the activity level, but retetris things around to give yourself more rest/recharge time?
I really appreciate the support, @Friday. I'm just not getting that in other places. I think pain is a complicated thing for me. Professionals have always (until very recently) told me to push through it or they have made it very clear that I was making more out of it than I should.

I usually think that I am lazy and resting too much. I have come to understand that I'm really not, that those thoughts have come from other folks. But it is still very hard for me to stop or slow down once I get started with something, even if it's creating a lot of pain. Like today, I worked 830-5 (from home), went through and cleaned out 8 dresser drawers, cleaned the 3 litter boxes, did a load of laundry, did the dishes, and started cleaning the living room. My hands hurt sooo bad, all the way up my forearms. And still, I sit here and answer emails, write here, and work on the book I'm writing.

I used to sit for days on end and not do anything because of the depression. Now, I do and do and do. I don't know what healthy recharge time looks like. I *am* taking a week off (next week); my niece is coming over on Saturday, and we're going for a drive along the river then coming back here for lunch. I've scheduled several appointments (trying to catch up on medical stuff I just haven't had the time to do), and my niece, mom, and I are going on a day trip Wednesday. I think the week will be good. One of the things I struggle with is the schedule of work. I hate it. With the course I just completed, I'm hoping I will be able at some point to quit and put my energy into my businesses. My time will be more flexible, which I think helps me manage much easier.
 
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