How many 'assesments' are needed?

[Lost in the Woods]

Take a deep breath. Do you have an attorney? Do you have a therapist? To me it sounds like te ex might have some narcissism in his behavior. This can be incredibly harmful to the receiving spouse. The best tool is to minimize contact. The only thing any of us can do is work on ourselves and let time expose the abuser for what they are. Be open about your shortcomings and desire to improve. My heart goes out to you on this.

 

[Movingforward10]

The family court is really tough and there is a lot of information about how abusers use the court process to continue to abuse.
Youigping through such a hard time.

If you aren't entitled to free legal aid, there are solicitors/barristers who can help for free. If you Google you might find something. There are also volunteers who can support you in court. Those volunteers canthelp with legal advice but they can help with support.

Has the court agreed to this further assessment?
Has the court decided that the allegations he has made about you, and you have made about him, are true or not? That is key because of the court has decided something, it becomes fact and true.

 

[Evie loves Sam]

He just had my daughter assessed too! She doesnt want to see me according to the psychologist. She was stigmatised because of my mental health - when my ex was the only one to tell people what mental health I had. She did not know I had mental health before he told her last year. She obviously told children at school and they teased her. He has used psychologists to narrate a story. Yes, the court said I had various delusional disorders and multiple personalities, so I guess that is FACT over the clinical diagnosis of PTSD I had. Yet, I cant get benefits for those conditions because my Clinical doctors disagree with the court diagnosis. Courts are opinions. Not facts. No charity can help me. I cant get legal aid. There are no free solicitors, i dont need a makenzie friend to just sit with me while charging £90 -£130 per hour. I dont even have that money. He left me with considerable debt. Now I am stigmatised with mental health I dont have and lost my only child. How do you think I feel?

 

[Movingforward10]

Home - Support Through Court

Our charity helps people facing the civil and family courts alone, supporting them so they have the fairest hearing possible.

supportthroughcourt.org

Have you tried them? ^^

You are going through something really difficult. I can't imagine how you feel.

 

[Lost in the Woods]

I used to practice law in California in a past life. I have no idea how it works where you are but here in a juvenile court matter regarding limiting or terminating parental rights a free attorney is appointed if a parent can’t afford one. The system everywhere is very imperfect. Here there is a presumption that family reunification is the desired outcome. Case workers must work towards that outcome until the court awarded that reunification is impossible or not in the child’s best interest. What you have described is considered a high conflict situation. Sometimes it takes several years for the court to really understand who the bad guy is. All I can say is the best thing you can do is work on yourself. You need to establish a rectors of attending all appointments and being cooperative. Let the other side’s conduct speak for itself. You don’t have to be perfect, just a good faith effort is needed. Be open and honest. Own your part and your shortcomings. That speaks miles to evaluators. There is a fine balance when speaking about the other side. They don’t want long narratives. When you speak of the other side just keep it brief like “i have concerns about his new girlfriends drinking”. Let them ask the follow up questions. Be calm and be adult. I am very sorry you are going through this, it is one of the most powerless situations a person can be subjected to.

 

[Evie loves Sam]

They dont see his conduct. They don't read anything. What he is doing is going under the radar.

Here I cant afford lawyers and dont get legal aid. I have used all the charities who tell me which applications to fill in but cant help woth anything else. I rely on AI to tell me which applications to fill in. Its more reliable.

The problem is, no one xan help me because I am still being abused. And, systemically abused too. He caused my PTSD, then denied me my diagnosis and said I had delusional disorders and multiple personalities, and then used that menral health to take my daughter and abuse me more. The courts dont see an abused woman with PTSD trying to protect her child - they see a mentally unwell and unstable parent because I react to his abuse. Dont tell me not to react? Because ots impossible not to react when ypu are being abused.

The courts will have me forensically assessed until someone guve him the diagnosis he wants.

The question now is, is his contstant hassaaament and assessments causing my mental health decline.

I am, and will be, another DV statistic because no one can stop the abuse. I will always be abused. No one gives a damn.

 

[Lost in the Woods]

I don’t know where you are but many domestic violence programs have clinics to help fill out forms. Also courts are required to have ADA coordinators that can help you slow dithering process to something that works for you. Lots of deep breaths, eventually it will end up how old are the kids?

 

[Evie loves Sam]

I don’t know where you are but many domestic violence programs have clinics to help fill out forms. Also courts are required to have ADA coordinators that can help you slow dithering process to something that works for you. Lots of deep breaths, eventually it will end up how old are the kids?

12 yrs old

 

[Evie loves Sam]

I don’t know where you are but many domestic violence programs have clinics to help fill out forms. Also courts are required to have ADA coordinators that can help you slow dithering process to something that works for you. Lots of deep breaths, eventually it will end up how old are the kids?

I spoke to Womans Aid at a clinic and the lawyerjust criticed me and told me I had done everything wrong - which doesnt help my trauma as I was demoralised, critised, shamed, blamed and gaslighted everyday for 20 years.

She made me feel hopeless.

I am trying not to let the demoralisation break me again and try to keep fighting, but the point of it us to make me give up. My pattern is to give up to the point of depression. If I fight back, I get gaslighted.