Two very different options and stuck between

[No More]

They are the same style, which is very niche, so there will always be an element of comparison. But equally I do that with option one, when I say something and she completely misses it/ goes from an analyst perspective I naturally yearn for the warm/ human/ compassionate response rather than a Freudian one..

Ahh I see. Is this something you could raise with No1? If she’s missing you then there might be mileage in either bringing it up with her? I didn’t realise you’d started with one and was thinking of dealing rather than two totally new options - my bad didn’t read properly. If you really aren’t clicking then absolutely changing would be a good move to trial.

 

[Midnightmoon]

Ahh I see. Is this something you could raise with No1? If she’s missing you then there might be mileage in either bringing it up with her? I didn’t realise you’d started with one and was thinking of dealing rather than two totally new options - my bad didn’t read properly. If you really aren’t clicking then absolutely changing would be a good move to trial.

Yeah I've been with one for a few months. I approached them both at the same time, but two was on sickness so I've just been sitting on the wait list until now, and almost forgot about it TBH.

Trying to bring up with one might have milage as at this point I feel I have little to lose...

 

[Tinyflame]

Much as analytically I would choose experience and money saving, new knowledge and more so connection or gut-reaction I would say trumps. I would say 2 if you can afford it. Especially if you have trust issues.

Good luck and know at least there should be some help!

 

[Midnightmoon]

Well, option 2 has added themselves to the list of 15 people who won't touch me... I guess that makes my choice easier!

 

[Friday]

Well, option 2 has added themselves to the list of 15 people who won't touch me... I guess that makes my choice easier!

I interviewed apx 250 therapists before landing on my last 2.

The first? Was 2 years of increasingly geographic rings, to find him. 10 hours away, round trip.

A the second? I got lucky on my first phone call.

Luck? Happens. So does perseverence.

 

[Charbella]

Well, option 2 has added themselves to the list of 15 people who won't touch me... I guess that makes my choice easier!

Why not?

 

[Midnightmoon]

@Friday that's some stamina! How did you keep up the motivation to keep looking? Each time someone declines I sink a little more and I'm so, so tired of being told no I'm at the point now where I almost expect them to say it as soon as I approach.

Why not?

Feels that I don't have a good enough support network around me to deal with the destabilisation that therapy will bring. That I present too much of a risk. This feels so hard, as my risk is low. I don't self harm/ substance use/ attend emergency departments etc etc. I am at home, the most risky you'll get me doing is dissociating the day away, but I do that anyway. I can't leave the house without a carer so it's not like I'm really chaotic.

 

[Midnightmoon]

My very frustrating saga continues, option one is throwing up many a challenge, including eating meals and snacks, replying to emails and reading her texts during appointments... (virtual)

I can't bring it up, it feels beyond rude of me to question her... but non of it is helping me feel secure in the slightest. I'm still looking for other options but just getting back decline after decline...I'm beginning to think that my only option is sticking with someone who is busy reading her emails (I asked her what she was doing, as I could see her reading and clicking, so she told me!) whilst I'm trying to talk about vulnerable stuff

 

[Friday]

can't bring it up, it feels beyond rude of me to question her...

What’s you’re d3finition of “rude”?

Mine is attaching someone without touching them.

Are you attacking her?

 

[Midnightmoon]

What’s you’re d3finition of “rude”?

Mine is attaching someone without touching them.

Are you attacking her?

Questioning her 3 and a half decades of experience I guess...

 

[Friday]

So, in your life, questioning someone is NOT a sign of respect? But an attack?

How about questions in general? What do they mean to you, either the sincere person asking them, or the person being asked? Do you see ME as rude in seeking clarification / edification? Or yourself as obligated, attacked, disrespected, etc.?

 

[Midnightmoon]

So, in your life, questioning someone is NOT a sign of respect? But an attack?

How about questions in general? What do they mean to you, either the sincere person asking them, or the person being asked? Do you see ME as rude in seeking clarification / edification? Or yourself as obligated, attacked, etc.

I'm looking for input via posting this, so I welcome questions/ mixed views to try and work out what I'm doing...

My T isn't looking for input... and I don't believe I have the right, as a low fee paying client, to demand she doesn't email/ text/ eat during session..