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Hi everyone!
I've recently been diagnosed with PTSD, but I'm finding it difficult to accept it. I can't stop thinking that my psychiatrist may have got it wrong. One of the things that creates the most doubts is that I'm unsure whether I actually have avoidance symptoms or not. In fact, I wonder whether I actually do the opposite of avoiding, when it comes to trauma-related thoughts. I find myself sort of indulging in traumatic fantasies, both ones that actually happened to me and imaginary ones. Sometimes I would say the fantasies are intrusive, but other times I find that I purposefully try to imagine painful scenarios just to find something concrete that allows me to externalize that unexplainable pain I feel. But isn't that the complete opposite of avoidance? Does anyone else experience this?
Thanks for reading,
Lex
I've recently been diagnosed with PTSD, but I'm finding it difficult to accept it. I can't stop thinking that my psychiatrist may have got it wrong. One of the things that creates the most doubts is that I'm unsure whether I actually have avoidance symptoms or not. In fact, I wonder whether I actually do the opposite of avoiding, when it comes to trauma-related thoughts. I find myself sort of indulging in traumatic fantasies, both ones that actually happened to me and imaginary ones. Sometimes I would say the fantasies are intrusive, but other times I find that I purposefully try to imagine painful scenarios just to find something concrete that allows me to externalize that unexplainable pain I feel. But isn't that the complete opposite of avoidance? Does anyone else experience this?
Thanks for reading,
Lex