Update: We Are Out

[JH11]

Just wanted to post to say we are finally out on our own, away from the control and everything else.

Wednesday morning she almost had an altercation with my 14 year old son as her and her daughter were "Showing the house" to a potential renter and when my son called to tell me there were people in the house, I told him to take his dog and go into my room. The woman "m" and her daughter subsequently began trying to force their way into my room and threatened to call the cops on him if he didn't let them in. I was out picking up my damage deposit cheque and had called the landlord after the 1st call from him, before it escalated.
My son told them to go ahead and call the cops because they aren't supposed to be talking to him in the first place.

Then they backed off. My landlord said "M claims they had thought there was nobody home " which we all know is BS.

The next morning I had a couple of friends move our beds and personal belongings to our new place. M was trying to convince the landlord to change the locks on me, to which he told me he was NOT going to do.

She said "but she filed a complaint on me to my work"... to which he said that had nothing to do with him and he was not changing the locks.

Yesterday morning the movers came and we got everything out. Thank God.

I knew that if I had spent one more night there after the incident with my son, I was not going to be able to cope. My stress was through the roof as was my kids'.


She is really starting to show her "true colors" now that she is not getting her way with me and my kids....its just scary that she is a counsellor. Real scary.



Just wanted to let you all know that we are out on our own and she doesn't have our new address nor my new cell #. I look forward to joining in on this board now that my life will start to settle somewhat. Thanks for all your support.

 

[macca]

So great that you are out!!! That lady is unbelievable - to think she is a therapist is very alarming indeed. Your son did some good thinking under great stress in calling them on their threat (of the cops). I hope you and your kids can start to feel safe now, and release some of that stress.

 

[greenleaf]

Yes, I really hope she is prevented from working as a therapist somehow, too... jeez.

 

[Samantha_38]

I've tried to understand this, and I just don't get it. Like why would a therapist do this? It's just SO way out there. I know some therapists, doctors, whoever do bad things to their patients. They get involved, either intentionally or unintentionally, but I somewhat "get" that attraction though. I especially get the unintentional, because I mean people who trust each other THAT much, with such sensitive information, it is almost natural to want to be closer. I'm in no way condoning this, obviously many good counselors and doctors either don't feel this way, or learn to control their feelings. Either way I understand why those situations come about. This is just over the top weird though. And it sounds like it was so intentional from the start. I will never understand.

Anyways I'm glad you are out. I really hope you and your kids will be able to trust someone again. I would have such a hard time finding a new person to talk to after this mess you have been through. I have yet to find my first person, so I can't even imagine.

 

[Barconian]

I've tried to understand this, and I just don't get it. Like why would a therapist do this?

Have you watched Silence of the lambs?

 

[JH11]

This whole thing is messed up. I have no idea why it happened, I do know I was extremely vulnerable in 2010 when I spent 3 months in the hospital (Feb-May) waiting my 2nd back surgery and she came every day with her daughter to visit me...

Then I left the hospital after my surgery and went to stay with them- my kids ended up back with me full time in June 2010 as my ex's partner left him and he could not take care of the kids. If you read my blog at triple w madebythehearth blogspot ca you will see that I was misdiagnosed with bipolar and medicated for 20 years until 2009.

So, when M came into the picture I had been off meds for a few months but really, not had a clear mind.

A couple of people have suggested that she wished I was her real daughter as her own daughter is/was "different". I don't know.

This whole situation is going to take some time to decompress from as it is such a shift to be on my own with my kids now in my own space and not having the extreme pressure and stress from her and her daughter.

People that hear what has happened just can't figure it out either. I don't understand it.

 

[Samantha_38]

Then I left the hospital after my surgery and went to stay with them-.

This is exactly where I get lost. I am in NO way saying you did anything wrong here. I have been that vulnerable before, and maybe still am. A whole reason part of my trauma even occurred is because I was that vulnerable due to the other part of my trauma. But what doctor, counselor, mental health professional...what have you...any medical professional has one of their clients/patients come live with them? I know it probably is not the first or last time its happened, but this is just where I think she was manipulating from the start. Even the visits she made with her daughter to see you in the hospital seems a little bit beyond what she should have been doing, but at least at that point some people would still consider this staying within her professional boundaries, since you were in the hospital. Helping you find a place, getting you into contact with some friends of hers, those all seem much more acceptable. Maybe not the "norm", but at least acceptable.

I want to just say, I really am not blaming you. The whole situation sounds completely irresponsible, unprofessional, and unacceptable on her part, and I can't get past what "she" was thinking. Then the fact that she still thinks this was something that was ok for her to do, and to be upset with you about it?!? It's just ridiculous. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this, because that is so unfair of her to put you in this situation after you trusted her. This situation just "floors" me, for lack of better way to describe it. I know people make mistakes, but she isn't even owning up to it, and this sounds extremely premeditated.

I know its confusing for you, and that you don't know why. That's probably the hardest part, it would be for me anyways, but I really hope you do well from here on out. Just know that this whole situation is definitely her fault, and I would stay away from anyone who tries to tell you otherwise.

 

[JH11]

@Samantha_38 Thank you, it all is quite overwhelming when I put the whole thing together.

Right down to her behavior last week..



I'm definitely going to be filing a complaint with the association she is registered with but I admit I'm a little concerned what she might escalate to when she is notified. However, that won't stop me.



I am so thankful to be on my own, I can't even explain how it feels.