I know this thread is a little old but I was looking at it again and related to Lilbit's post. [So not fair to share and then not stick around, push them away. If you don't want someone in your life to stay, why put all that stuff in their heart and head?]
My "ex" S early on told me quite a bit of his history ( he was drinking). He didn't get to complete it due to an interruption. ( we were voice chatting on a teamspeak channel). He left me with so many questions, but wasn't happy when I asked. He tried to answer my emails the best he could at first because he knew he had opened up and started it, and I believe at that time he really did like me, but later on he got quite upset with me for trying to get 'involved' in his personal, real life (ours was an online friendship), and ultimately used this as his reason for "dumping" me ( twice).
(We never had a "real" relationship, just a gaming friendship, though we admitted to having feelings for each other near the start he was quick to follow with we could never have something real)
He regretted what he had done by sharing, and felt like I was meddling when I just wanted to understand and be a friend. I grew to really care for him and admit I wished for more from him.
My having this knowledge of him made him become suspicious of me that I would tell other online gaming friends, and our gaming relationship has thus been sabotaged. I came here to learn about PTSD and have tried hard to communicate with him but he doesn't respond. It feels completely unfair that I have been turned into an enemy when I truly care for him so much. I have been hoping he would get through this 'episode' and see that I'm not a threat, but that hasn't happened yet, and I'm really doubting it will.
I'm seen as a crazy, obsessive ex that he needs to hide away from and avoid, and that is exactly what I'm becoming...because I want so desperately to defend myself (primarily to another online gaming friend of ours) but at the same time feel obligated to protect him. Uck. There is no good answer at how to deal with the avoidance, it's hard to have no control over a situation and to have to just live with it. It takes work to rise above the conflicting feelings and maintain dignity. More power to you all that are able to do it. :)
