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Vent - Disappointment

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I don't think it is that those of us on the forum "don't care or are not interested" in this or any aspect of Anthony's life. I think it is that we don't think in the positive very often and tend to not visit the Success Story Section.
I think Grama-Herc said it all for me there to. Sorry to have offened you Nicolette. I wish Anthony the best! He made this forum to help all of us. Thank you Anthony:thumbs-up And sorry again Nicolette.
Judy
 
Hi Nicolette,

I rarely go into the success stories. I'm not sure why? I didn't see the post until I read this one, and then I went and looked for it. Sorry.....

I'm happy for Anthony and you. I'm sure this has a profound affect on you as well as Anthony and not to mention his children. I'm sure they are feeling better about it too.

I hope he continues to get better and maybe some day he won't need this forum and can afford to pay someone else to run it for him (If that is his desire)?

I think it is unhealthy to be in this forum too long, or any forum for that matter.

I wish all of you the best
Tammy
 
I just started here a few months ago and it has already helped me a great deal. I don't know Anthony, I don't know Nicolette. I do know what you do has helped at least one person in this world (me). I rarely visit the success thread. It is also difficult for me to take kudos or pats on the back and I think most of us, in general, would rather get involved in the ugly of PTSD rather than look at the good. Maybe that can be said for much of our lives. This is something I'm learning to change. I have to force myself to read positive books, watch positive shows, be around healthy people.

SO...maybe a challenge is in order...for myself and others that read this. Maybe when we come to the forum we should make it a POINT to read the Success Stories link before we leave the forum. Maybe logging off with something good in our heads will help fight some of the doom, gloom and alone feelings we all have. I'll start---- Damn good job Anthony AND Nicolette!!!!
 
Sorry Nicolette I just took the thread the wrong way. Between the written word and having a PTSD brain, well mistakes are made sometimes. I apologize!!!!!

Yes, I do think that all of us need support, encouragement, and at times a kick in the ass. I will take my ass kicking now thank you!!!! LOL!!!!!

Sorry for the confusion.... Hugs.
 
I know how proud you feel about Anthony having other interests, I have a boyfriend who is always encouraging me to get out and do things. When I do he is so proud, I could imagine that for CARERS is like watching us start living again.

Yes it is Sparky! Exactly my point and how good does that make you feel also?!

I did want to let others know I did hold off on my venting initially but after there were 78 views of the thread, with little response, I felt really disappointed for Anthony. It's also my excitement too...like Sparky said: its like watching Anthony live a life again!
 
Thanks also to everyone else who has posted. I am and was not offended...merely disappointed for Anthony as I guess I am guilty of wanting the best for him. :rolleyes:
 
Hi Nicolete,

I think part of the picture was the original wording. I also read the previous posting but did not post--well because of the wording. The wording distracted from the intent of the posting. As a career or a person with PTSD we sometimes feel regected. The wording was kind of reproachful or....unwelcoming. It is easy for me to feel offended and withdrawl. Nothing to do with Anthony---who I appreciate but do not know, well. It's just that you might take it less as rejection for Anthony, but more a step back from fiesty agression as you stand for and defend the one you love. Certainly not a bad quality, but consider we are not bad people eigther. Words matter and play a big role. I hope you understand and don't take offense that your intentions may be misinterprited at times. It happens to all of us.

Gena
 
The wording was kind of reproachful or....unwelcoming.

Please elaborate....I'd like to understand as I don't see how you interpreted the post as unwelcoming.

It is easy for me to feel offended and withdrawl.

Thanks for your honesty Gena. I still don't understand PTSD that well and didn't realise that what I wrote would offend anyone as it was about Anthony only. Do you think that is entirely PTSD or also self-esteem related?

Please understand that I try to think carefully about what I write as I do understand PTSD sufferers can tend to have a different perspective. I don't want to offend anyone here.
 
I must admit, I read the post and loved the frog story so much that I sent it to a couple of friends I thought would benefit and then got caught up in my emails and never responded to the thread.

I have not been on the forum much because I am busy and very happy to be!

Great to hear Anthony is doing so well.
 
Just offerring another perspective...

Often I click on "New Posts" to get a list of threads that have been posted to since the last time I was on the forum and then pick what I read from that list. The downfall, I've realized, is that I often don't notice what area the thread was posted in, such as "PTSD Success Stories". Had I paid attention to the fact that your post was in the success stories section I probably would have interpreted it differently. However, this wasn't the case.

I had not read Anthony's original post that you quoted so I did not know what that was about. To me, the first half of what you posted sounded like you were upset with someone on the forum and stepping in to defend Anthony.

I did want to say that I don't think Anthony needs to apologise for having other healthy interests as well as the forum. A balance between the two is good. Like Anthony says to others you need to have a life outside of the forum.

Yes, I read the rest of what you wrote but I guess my PTSD brain just glazed right over the positive. All I went away with was the impression that you were upset with someone for giving Anthony a hard time for not being around (I now realize that wasn't the case) and that it didn't involve me so I would just stay out of it. I wasn't at all offended, just trying to mind my own business. If other people read it the same way that I did, that might explain why there were so many views to the thread without much response.

...about how well Anthony was doing with having some projects which currently keep him occupied during the day versus spending hours and hours on the computer. He looks better (more fit and healthy) and is doing extraordinarily well on top of an excellent job with his projects. It is really nice to watch him have motivation to get out of bed and get going into the day ahead.

This post explained to me much better what it was you were trying to convey.

I must admit, however, that even if I had interpreted the original thread correctly I probably still wouldn't have responded. I don't accept compliments very well myself and while I am quite capable of giving compliments IRL, I still feel awkward doing it on the forum. I consider myself to still be a newbie on the forum. I feel very timid about giving a pat on the back to someone I don't know and with whom I haven't had any substantive exchange.

Honestly, I don't know much about Anthony. I know that he has combat related PTSD and that he started/maintains this wonderful forum. Since I am still new to the forum, I haven't observed him posting to very many threads or to be around a whole lot. (I'm not complaining, merely observing.) So I didn't realize that this was apart from the norm for him. I guess I didn't realize that his successes were so new.

But, since I've written so much already...Way to go Anthony!! :occasion: And, by the way, thanks for creating and maintaining this forum. I really appreciate everything you've put into it.
 
Thanks again to those who have posted.

May I say my thread was not directed at any newbies and was just a vent as, based on the interaction I have watched Anthony have with many people here, I just thought that there would be more than 2 posts. Just shows how we can misjudge things.

While on the topic, I think it is interesting the difference in interpretation and I am learning a lot from this thread.

Another thing I want to point out, which others are mentioning, is the tendency to pick up the negatives instead of the positives. Perhaps that can be something to work on for those who are interested?
 
Catjudo,

Love the name:wink: You did a much better job communicating than I did. It comes down to, good for Anthony and many thanks for what he did and does.

Another note, Nicolette also contributes much of herself to the forum. Thank you also.

Tachiku
 
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