Was Today's Time Wasted?

[littlelostchild]

I know it is frustrating. I have had sessions where I have not wanted to talk or tried to manipulate the time and felt like it was a waste after, but it is never a waste. I think it means you are working on something really difficult that you are getting ready to release something important.

If you get the urge to self harm, do you have a safety plan? Will you come to the forum? Sleep deprivation can be a tricky thing and I want you to be safe.

 

[scout86]

she's just trying to protect. It's been her job to make every tough memory disappear and stay inside.

I don't know if it's helpful for you, but my T has mentioned a number of times that these "parts" that have taken on "jobs" like to have something to do. Sometimes, when what they are doing isn't helpful, it works to find them a different, more "adapted to the present" job. Maybe you can think of another job for the part that shuts down your ability to talk that will be more beneficial to you NOW, while recognizing that there probably was a time when turning off the words was actually useful

 

[JEKBreatheandBelieve]

@littlelostchild - I do not have a safety plan. That part has an alternative activity (rubbing cold rocks on the skin), but she's not been wanting those lately. She did cut a little last night, but not too much so I know she's trying. I did get a little bit of sleep last night so hopefully that helps. Thanks for your concern.

@scout86 - My therapist has also talked about the jobs. So far we've managed to slowly gain the trust of that part that it's time to talk through these things, but when times are particularly tough, she changes her mind. I don't know how to change the jobs, but it's something we're considering. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

 

[BloomInWinter]

I had the chair moving sensation happen to me more than a handful of times in the months of my treatment where my "younger parts" were beginning to show themselves in therapy. It was terrifying. It felt like an earthquake.

I kept practicing my self-comforting statements, and I bought myself a teddy bear and some cute outfits for it. I began using it like I was a small child. Whenever I was overwhelmed, I cuddled with it. Friends signed their names to some felt hearts I had sewn into it.

After many months of talking gentle and reassuringly to the part of myself which felt small and unimportant and unsafe, the incidents of the chair shaking went away. It doesn't happen anymore. My legs still shake at times, but I know it just means a part of me has been triggered, and it's a sign to slow down and comfort myself.

It gets better.