Was really shamed and embarrassed today, and as a result did something I should have for a long time. To be clear, the person didn't embarrass or shame me outwardly, I just knew they didn't understand, and it was shameful and embarrassing. I know I should feel ~'good' about acting on it- I guess?- but I don't, really. I don't think shame is a very good motivator. :( I tried to make a joke later, tried to not 'maximize' it, tried to put it in context- after all it's 9/11, and a 'good' day in another way for me (I'm almost ashamed to say, since it 'is' 9/11 :(:cry: ). I think too it made me feel as others might feel at times, since I was misrepresented. But then again, though the reason was different, the consequence was the same. So if I was misrepresented, it comes back to they don't understand the cause.
So I suppose I feel shame, embarrassment, some regret, empathetic, humbled, tired, and super-overwhelmed. There are so many triggers, enough for a month of sundays. :( :cry: I would cry, if I could.
So I suppose I feel shame, embarrassment, some regret, empathetic, humbled, tired, and super-overwhelmed. There are so many triggers, enough for a month of sundays. :( :cry: I would cry, if I could.
