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What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

Some crazy contemplative overdrive. There is a pattern here, good day(s), followed by bad day(s) and then a recovery where I sort through what was "good" and what was "bad". Mentally sorting today.
 
Feeling kind of proud today because I was able to go back to work yesterday after being off monday through friday. I have never missed work due to anxiety before and it really scared me. I was worried I wouldn't be able to stop the spin cycle this time.

Feeling pretty anxious today too. I have to face my T. tomorrow after saying some *psychotic* things last time I was there. I know he will want to talk about them again. Plus, I cancelled my session at the last minute this past week, because I didn't want to discuss those things. So I have to go in and face it, face him and face myself......pretty scary....
 
(((HUGS))) Jade. Boy do I know what you mean about not wanting to face your T after sharing, I freak about having to go in a face mine sometimes. You have said this before. Please remember that when this has happened in the past you always feel better after discussing it with your T. That will be the case this time too.

(((HUGS))) too deer.
 
I am feeling better today than yesterday. Somewhat exhausted after an emotional discussion with my husband. I am happy that I was able to cry and let out so much pain. And greatly encouraged that I didn't dissociate during or after the intense sobbing. That is HUGE!
 
Feeling kind of proud today because I was able to go back to work yesterday after being off monday through friday. I have never missed work due to anxiety before and it really scared me. I was worried I wouldn't be able to stop the spin cycle this time.

Feeling pretty anxious today too. I have to face my T. tomorrow after saying some *psychotic* things last time I was there. I know he will want to talk about them again. Plus, I cancelled my session at the last minute this past week, because I didn't want to discuss those things. So I have to go in and face it, face him and face myself......pretty scary....

I hope you will get yourself to go this time. Your therapist will be patient. If the things you said were that bad, your therapist wouldn't have let you leave I don't think. The PTSD makes us so hard on ourselves. I admire you for going to work when it was difficult.
 
That's true I guess, PTSDT, if what I said was 'that' bad, he probably would have sent me straight to the hospital. Maybe he knew my thinking was just screwed up at the time and that it would pass(again). It's just hard to face him after I've been on a downward spiral. And I'm going to force myself to go today, no matter how anxious I am.

I'm glad I was able to go back to work. This is the first job I've ever been able to keep and it's important to me that I hold on to it.
 

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