What Is This?

[Fadeaway]

Yesterday on my way to therapy, my husband told me that a few nights prior during what I thought was disassociation I was talking about being in the hospital and asking where the baby was. I would know if I was having a flash back right? When having a flashback I am always vaguely aware of being in two places at once, and I remember it.
I know exactly what event that would be. It was the event that triggered about a year of total disassociation. Out of everything I went through, that was the worst. There are things that happened to me that sound worse, but that had a deeper impact on me.

I wasn't sure what to think, but then he repeated the story to my therapist. and honestly I was horrified and him talking about it really bothered me.

We had gotten in a really bad fight prior to this happening, if that matters at all.

 

[Justmehere]

It is possible to dissociate into a state where you relive an event like it is happening now, and to not remember it at all.

It's happened to me. My therapist said it's a little like regressing... I was so embarrassed about it we didn't talk much. It happened once where I numbed out and talked like I had just survived a trauma that happened three years ago. The other time it happened, I talked like my father was after me like when I was 12. I don't remember it at all.

Both the times it happened for me, there was pretty significant stressor going on in my current life. My therapist said to me simply that the damn broke. I think another way to look at it is that my stress cup was full.

I'm not sure what was going on for you, but maybe it was something similar.