What Makes You Sad Today

[JarHed]

Hey Sarg

Are you looking into my head? What you say sounds so like me, as well. I don't know if there's an answer. I have a really hard time doing something, like calling and talking to people. Or getting out, really like my hole under this rock. You know what I mean.

I do know this, time is all we have no matter how long or short. I try not to think about it much or it can get a bit scary. I just try to enjoy each day as it comes; some are good, some or OK and some suck the big one.

I have a wooded area a short ways from my house and I don't go there enough. When I do I always feel more calm, and in tune with things. It makes sense to me. It makes me feel like I'm a part of something much bigger. Hope I'm not rambling.

I once heard a saying that was something like; 'life is what happens while were making plans for other things'.

Jar

 

[Tim Cake]

The fact that a very large percentage of the young people formerly under my command are now homeless. WTF has happened to our national conscience?

 

[Need an Oasis]

Learned that a close friend tried to off himself last week.

 

[Jimmy1]

It is very sad that some people don't know where to find the help, or that help is only a phone call away.
But I understand each and every person that chooses that path, regardless of how selfish it is. Sometimes there is no pill or person to help 'Stuff' go away. You just have to ride out the storm.

 

[JarHed]

As hard as it is to say, I've been at that point myself. I can understand the mindset, you just want the pain to stop. It's a horrible feeling and I'd say for me, my thinking wasn't clear at the time. How could it be. Somehow, with everything, I'm still around. The sad part, perhaps, is that most who are at that point can't reach out for help. Hope your friend finds their way to a better place Oasis.

 

[Need an Oasis]

Jimmy and Jar, I understand him, I really do, because in many ways he is a lot worse off than I am. It just hit a little too close to home this time. I have thought about it once or twice too. The thing that stopped me was not that I was thinking about what it would do to my husband, or mother, or friends, but that I couldn't bear to leave my dog behind. What kind of a person does that make me...

 

[JarHed]

What kind of a person does that make me...

A good one and caring one. What ever the reason is that makes us not take that terrible step is a good one. Don' t judge yourself too harshly my friend.

 

[Anglesachse]

...........most who are at that point can't reach out for help. .................

Some of us would rather be found in a heap of shit, knowing we are no longer a problem to others than ask help.

I for my part would rather ignore help from others, and suffer in silence than accept help from jemand who thinks he cares.

 

[Zipperhead]

Who's jemand?

 

[Need an Oasis]

It's German for "somebody".

 

[Rezdawg]

Numb. Not sad. Not happy. Numb.
The normal day to day highs and lows don't seem to cut it. The highs and lows I've experienced far out surpass most things in this life. Except the birth of my children. I accept pain and loss and push through these days with calmness and no sense of sadness as I should. My wife had a miscarriage just last week. She cried for days. I'm not sure I shed a tear. I got up and went to work and didn't say a word.


I'm waiting for something to happen. Every argument or heated exhange I over hear I hope hope spills over in to a real fight. I hope to pick a side and do some damage. I don't think that's normal. I don't want to hurt anyone. I want the thrill of battle again. Ive taken up jiujitsu. Thats helped.

You'll have to forgive me I think I'll ramble on and on for a bit till I start to accept this. Even now I'm learning more of how I feel towrads things and people in my life. I'm happy with who I am today. My family isn't. Think I'll try and sleep.

 

[Tim Cake]

Numb. Not sad. Not happy. Numb.
The normal day to day highs and lows don't seem to cut it. The highs and lows I've experienced far out surpass most things in this life. Except the birth of my children. I accept pain and loss and push through these days with calmness and no sense of sadness as I should. My wife had a miscarriage just last week. She cried for days. I'm not sure I shed a tear. I got up and went to work and didn't say a word.


I'm waiting for something to happen. Every argument or heated exhange I over hear I hope hope spills over in to a real fight. I hope to pick a side and do some damage. I don't think that's normal. I don't want to hurt anyone. I want the thrill of battle again. Ive taken up jiujitsu. Thats helped.

You'll have to forgive me I think I'll ramble on and on for a bit till I start to accept this. Even now I'm learning more of how I feel towrads things and people in my life. I'm happy with who I am today. My family isn't. Think I'll try and sleep.

I have found that martial arts (and their meditative facet) help with CPTSD. I also like beating the living crap out out of a punching bag when I have a panic attack -- I go at it until fatigue knocks me down. Drugless therapy!