When A Death Brings Secrets Out

[Snowflake]

This morning my uncle died, my dads closest brother. He died about 5 yrs after my dad-both had Alzheimer's . I sent my condolences to my cousin-we were each others playmates on 500 acres of land. We lost contact for many years till today-when she said she wasn't close to her dad, she thought she was my other uncles child. She said her dad only talked about me. Hmmm I didn't know that. Anyhow-I learned my blood type is the same as my cousins. Not my moms or my siblings. It has always made me wonder if I was my uncles child-now I wonder more. My cousin also mentioned being raped by another cousin of mine-the same one that raped me in a bad/cult way. I think she is shocked and confused as I am. I am not sure if I am going to the funeral or not-I will see my brother and another cousin who enjoyed my body as well. I am already feeling scared just thinking about it. And my therapist is on vacation ugh. I feel like this is a way of testing me or something.

 

[scout86]

I've skipped a lot of funerals, a couple for people I really liked, for reasons like that. Not saying it's the right thing to do. I have no idea if it is or not, but it seemed like the reasonable thing to do at the time and it still does.

On the blood type thing..... how much it means depends on the blood types. A and B are dominant to O, so a person could end up type O without a parent who is, for example. There are a several possibilities, so it's hard to know what it means. If your parents are both type O and you're not, that probably means something. (Unless someone's had a bone marrow transplant.)

Reconnecting with your cousin might turn out to be good for both of you, who knows?

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I so understand your situation, and I agree with Scout that not going is a very good thing to think about just taking care of you. I wish you well with your cousin. I wish you well in all of the things you are beginning to discover.

 

[EveHarrington]

:hug:

 

[Tinyflame]

:hug: from here too. Whatever you choose I hope you won't feel guilty or afraid about it.

:hug:

 

[Rumors]

All I can do is send you loads of support. That is tough. Perhaps you could reach out to her after the funeral? In any case, she may have some answers you are looking for! Good luck and hang in there!

 

[Whyteferret]

This morning my uncle died, my dads closest brother. He died about 5 yrs after my dad-both had Alzhei...

@Snowflake
It seems you're caught against three rings:
1. I don't want to go because of the family and abuse
2. I want to be there for my cousin
3. Maybe Imshould go for myself (?)

There is nothing wrong with choosing not to go. Choose what you think is best for you in terms of going/ not going.

Is there a way to support your cousins without actually going to the services?