Relationship When it's time to leave

I don't know that this really makes any difference, but there's another disorder, borderline personality disorder, that fits some of what you've described. Doesn't really change the fact that the situation is unworkable. Whatever is going on with her, it sounds like you've done all YOU can do. She's got to decide to seek out professional help and then do the work if anything is going to change. If supporters could actually fix people, most of us would have been "fixed" a long time ago.

Something I've noticed since I've been a member here, there are a subset of supporters who seem to have a mission to "save" people. These seem like really kind, caring, wonderful people. But they seem driven to take on responsibility for things they can't really be responsible for. Like "saving" someone like your ex from themselves. There's a difference between that kind of "saving" and things like helping and supporting. It's subtle, but it's there. You have to take care of yourself too, you're worth it.