When were you at your healthiest/happiest post trauma?

[Casey_03]

I have been trying to pinpoint at what time in my life was I my healthiest and happiest? And what was I doing at that time that helped me be healthy and happy (after one of my traumas ... the others came later).

I was at my utmost best when I was training in mixed martial arts for 4 hours a day, every day. I had a family (of fellow athletes), a mentor, goals, and the intensive work-outs really helped me avoid depression and anxiety. Of course, I was much younger then too. But I was so much more confident, and fearless. I wish I could go back to that time. I would love to feel that strong again.

How bout you guys? I realize some sufferers may not be able to recall a time when they were healthier and happier. So I hope this question doesn't come off as offensive.

(P.S. I started thinking about this when the issue of self-defense came up in a different thread, and it reminded me how much martial arts and working out helped me)

 

[Heather]

A few months ago I was feeling really good. Apartment living OK, making plans for my future I.e. going back to school, my daughter settling in to her new school, being more responsible I.e. paying bills, keeping house clean etc.

Now I feel like shit. Stuff has happened that's really messed with my head.

Emotional regulation is something I need to work on MORE.

Hopefully things will even out and I won't feel like driving my car I to a tree some time soon.

 

[Sideways]

This might sound similar, but it was when I was working in civil trial work. Same deal: neck-deep in goal-oriented work that demanded a very significant degree of focus and drive, and which I had to stay quite physical-health-wise to pull off.

It actually wasn't easy to answer, because I got caught up for a while in the "I've never been really happy...waaaaah!!!!", but then I reminded myself that happiest and happy are not the same thing:rolleyes:

 

[Casey_03]

I think having achievable goals is a huge part of being happy, or at least content. Goals, people you care about around you, and health. I think those are the three most important things. Also a home, or a roof over your head, and money helps too!

 

[Heather]

I also think I am with the mind set of: fake it til you make it.

Everything I do these days scares me but I push myself and do it anyways.

I have completely bought a whole new wardrobe. Dresses (haven't worn one in decades) cute/fancy tops, 3 pairs of new shoes not the usual sneakers. I'm wearing make up again.

I'm hoping the more effort I put into my appearance, eventually it'll pay off by me feeling better.

I put the clothes on and to be honest I feel like crap but the compliments I get from people make me feel good.for a little while.

 

[Leah123]

The happiest I've been was after leaving my abuser, dropping out of high school, but then finding an amazing community of other queer youth, spending a lot of time there and then doing a ton of volunteer work with them. I felt purposeful, not alone and like the future held promise. I had a job so I was finally earning some money and feeling independent. It was great. I always look to that unencumbered time as the benchmark for happiness.

I will say that just two years ago I finally graduated college (38 years old) and that was probably my most recent happiest, that and landing an internship in the new field. I'm leaving my current job in a few months for a new job in that field I hope, after working 60 hours a week at home for many years now, so I hope I am a lot happier then with more free time and doing something I'm more passionate about.