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Regardless of anthers diagnosis, abuse in the form of criticism , controlling behavior, or giving up your needs to please another is not healthy. Have you looked into codependants anonymous.
I understand you care for your partner, but being with someone who is suffering does not need to mean giving up yourself.
While I have PTSD, I also grew up in a family where my father suffered serious trauma. My mothers response was extremely codependant, and that was hurtful to all of us. In other words, our lives revolved around managing his dysfunctional behavior rather than setting boundaries so that he could take responsibility for his behviors that stemmed from his trauma.
 
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