Where to go with it - dig deeper or drop it?

LucyLou

Learning
I don't really know where to go with therapy at the mo. Had a good session on Tues, last few sessions have been about J and she really helped me get some bits out....I still have a lot wrote down, that I'm going to send her....partly because I want to be able to delete it from my phone and partly because I don't want to have written it all out for nothing....but I think I'm done talking about him for now....or do I keep on with it, with her help as this is the farthest I've gotten to talking about this. My reason for wanting to stop is that I found it emotional/draining but it's always going to be that way, isn't it....even if I stopped now and brought it up further down the line, it'd still be just as difficult....so do I carry on with this and get some closure on some of it. I have no idea what's best.
 
It doesn't have to be one way or the other. You can stop and pick it up again. Sometimes, space provides clarity. Even if it remains difficult, perspective changes because we've changed, grown, etc. If you want to carry on, that's okay too. I am sometimes like a dog with a bone; I gnaw until I get to the center. Emotionally draining is hard, but can be productive. Can you break for a session and then resume?

What are your goals on the matter? What is going to promote those goals the best?
 
Can you bring this up with your therapist?

Maybe the therapy can be about how to manage the emotional draining parts? Help through that so that you feel more able to carry on?
 
Just a thought:

I initially finished trauma therapy, once my PTSD symptoms had decreased to a point where I could function "well enough". Now, many years later, I'm having to go back and deal with all the stuff I left undealt with initially. I'm not sure I regret my choices... maybe it was for the best. But I also wonder if it would have been better to keep going and really deal with all the trauma in therapy, the first time around. Maybe it would've made my life so much easier and maybe I would've made better life choices along the way?

I think whatever you decide is fine... Both options have pros and cons...
 
My reason for wanting to stop is that I found it emotional/draining but it's always going to be that way, isn't it.
Pfft. Nope.

Once trauma is fully processed? It’s as emotionally draining as discussing tomato soup, or shoe laces, or raccoons. TOTAL non-issue. Being draining? Means there’s still work to do.

Avoidance (symptom) means it will “always” seem like total BS… until? Oh. How f*cking cool is that?!? I really couldn’t care less / there is ZERO effect in/on me. At all. How did this happen?!? Weird. Cool, but weird. …until? Normal. Because it’s processed. And in the past. Where it belongs. Instead of shredding, or impacting, my present.
 
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