Why Are People Consumed By Politics?

[Flying Dove]

Some of what I wrote about is in an article from psychology today online. Do you fear the future? Polyvagal theory. I have told my husband more than once if what he talks about happens then I will die and that is ok.

 

[Flying Dove]

My nervous system and brain have over reacted to all this. My husband and I have a few more heated conversations. I have started itching all over. In the past I warned my husband I could have a seizure from this talk. He has never accepted that. Even said to me once you are not going to have a seizure. Yes I can. And it could not be far from SUDEP. This is what my father never got.His father had epilepsy died at age 43. His death certicate said heart attack. That is how people die with SUDEP. I am never going to convince my husband of any different ways of living or thinking,

 

[OceanSpray]

I don’t know how helpful my advice would be. I am glad you’re talking to your therapist about this.

For one, I don’t think there is anything necessarily wrong with have some sort of prep stuff going on. Not necessarily for doomsday, but bad weather, poorer times, like it’s not inherently bad to participate in things that could help you in the future.

But this shouldn’t be yalls sole focus and you really, really, really (husband included in the collective you) need to step away from the TV and find other things to do with your time. I think getting out in the community through either part time work or volunteering would go a long way. Other hobbies would be great, gardening for instance.

But seriously, take news breaks. Nothing wrong with staying informed but trying to stay *this* informed will make you go crazy.

 

[user27357]

I am politically concerned, but not consumed. Everytime I think about my grandkids asking me what I did in 2024 I fear that saying "i didn't vote for the him" won't score me much gratitude. Hopefully we can get away with not being consumed by politics in 2024. Hopefully our grandkids won't hate us for it.

 

[Sideways]

But seriously, take news breaks.

I’d go further and suggest “tech-breaks”.

Include not just news, but anything that you get through a screen. Limit it to a set period a day, then put the screens away and get on with your actual life. Right now. The things around you, the people around you.

Because it sounds like your actual life is more than enough for both of you to deal with.

 

[Flying Dove]

I subscribed to Amazon prime trying to watch a dogs purpose. Having trouble focusing on it. Keep thinking about how husband has said let the dogs out if I am in trouble. They are just dogs. Husband is a good man has done good things for me. But I am in fear again. Of him of something unlikely to occur.

 

[Flying Dove]

I’d go further and suggest “tech-breaks”.

Include not just news, but anything that you get through a screen. Limit it to a set period a day, then put the screens away and get on with your actual life. Right now. The things around you, the people around you.

Because it sounds like your actual life is more than enough for both of you to deal with.

Thank you. I am attempting to do this.

 

[scout86]

Is your husband seeing a therapist of his own? I wasn't kidding when I mentioned hypervigilence. If you look at it from the perspective of someone who feels like they are actually LIVING in a life & death situation RIGHT NOW, his behavior kind of makes sense. In a real world situation, he'd get better results by being more diplomatic, but he's not in a position to see that. (The word "disorder" is in the name of the diagnosis for a reason.) You have to look out for yourself, whatever that involves, but when you're dealing with him, you're probably not dealing with someone who's seeing "reality" the same way most people do.

 

[Upside Down Eagle]

I am thinking there is a difference between informed and consumed. He checks several times daily if not more. Looking for the breakdown that leads to complete disintegration of society. He has been doing this for many years. Long before we met.

Sounds like addictive/escapist behavior to me. When I get OCD, I hyper-focus on something. I put all my focus on that, but that's usually my way of escaping other things. I can relate to spending hours researching news stuff though, but it was always avoidant behavior.

Sporting events and football matches also come to mind, although I feel like a genuine sports event would be more honest than our politicians :-(

 

[Flying Dove]

Is your husband seeing a therapist of his own? I wasn't kidding when I mentioned hypervigilence. If you look at it from the perspective of someone who feels like they are actually LIVING in a life & death situation RIGHT NOW, his behavior kind of makes sense. In a real world situation, he'd get better results by being more diplomatic, but he's not in a position to see that. (The word "disorder" is in the name of the diagnosis for a reason.) You have to look out for yourself, whatever that involves, but when you're dealing with him, you're probably not dealing with someone who's seeing "reality" the same way most people do.

Thank you. The answer is no. I see what you saying about his behavior making sense..I am also looking at me more. I am probably projecting my fears onto him too..I told him today he needs to keep the 3 of us safe- me my dogs. And to forgive me. Somehow I have to meet him half way let go leave his feelings and need to protect to him..He is never going to admit he has an issue. Other people especially his parents told him he has issues..He has frightened me so much. He says I seem hateful. Fear is terrible. Is it anywhere near reality that it all ends like he says? Stupid question but I need others thoughts. We are in a crisis over this. Over 3 years. I do need to stop take a breath when I feel need to blame project then discuss with him my feelings. And work again on my self esteem. Thank you so much

 

[Sideways]

I told him today he needs to keep the 3 of us safe

Fear is terrible. Is it anywhere near reality that it all ends like he says?

Can I ask (you may have covered this elsewhere), what is it exactly that you’re afraid of? That you want him to keep you safe from?

 

[Flying Dove]

Can I ask (you may have covered this elsewhere), what is it exactly that you’re afraid of? That you want him to keep you safe from?

Ok. He is a veteran. Very good husband. This sounds illogical but this year's election. The media has the ability to show events that are not real aka a riot run on banks the president being hospitalized. I have ptsd and am doing my best not to over react let alone act without a plan or proof that something needs to be done. He is sure based on his beliefs it is all going to collapse. He definitely has core beliefs- this is his destiny to survive this keep me his daughter grandkids safe. What if he over reacts? He was in war zones. Bosnia etc. I am the problem if I discuss polyvagal theory too much adrenaline the amygdala cortex etc. That is my fear about him and others tol focused on the pathology in the US.

Ok. He is a veteran. Very good husband. This sounds illogical but this year's election. The media has the ability to show events that are not real aka a riot run on banks the president being hospitalized. I have ptsd and am doing my best not to over react let alone act without a plan or proof that something needs to be done. He is sure based on his beliefs it is all going to collapse. He definitely has core beliefs- this is his destiny to survive this keep me his daughter grandkids safe. What if he over reacts? He was in war zones. Bosnia etc. I am the problem if I discuss polyvagal theory too much adrenaline the amygdala cortex etc. That is my fear about him and others tol focused on the pathology in the US.

Regulating me my nervous system is critical for me. Setting boundaries saying no. I have a seizure risk from craniotomy done 5/2014. I have been seizure free all this time.

I’d go further and suggest “tech-breaks”.

Include not just news, but anything that you get through a screen. Limit it to a set period a day, then put the screens away and get on with your actual life. Right now. The things around you, the people around you.

Because it sounds like your actual life is more than enough for both of you to deal with.

My tech breaks and limiting setting you suggested are working thank you.