Supporter Wife Of Former Marine

[Izzy]

My husband is currently seeking treatment for PTSD. Though I try to be objective and supportive, I can't shake this bitter resentment I have towards his condition. After years of watching him self destruct, I'm finding it hard to let go of my own issues (mostly my controlling nature). I understand that in order for him to manage his PTSD, I need to let go of my hang ups and create a healthy environment in which I neither enable nor punish his condition.

Once upon a time, I thought I was prepared for this. I thought that one bad day here and there is normal, eventually they will become few and far between. Then I associated his bad days with his drinking (that's usually the only time he opens up). His drinking became a daily habbit, and therefor the topic of our fights. I have begged him to stop drinking, thinking that sobriety would cure him. It never lasts. I feel that I can't depend on him because he is so disconnected. I believe that is where my need to control comes from. He doesn't take care of his daily obligations, so I do it for him.

I hope that through this message board, I can find the piece of mind that I need in order to be there for my husband. I plan to spend a few days reading old posts. Hopefully in the future I can offer some input.

 

[sisu]

Hello Izzy,
Welcome! I glad to read that your husband is seeking treatment - that is a great sign. Without treatment the PTSD is in control, not your husband. Come on over to the supporters section - there are lots of great people who support and are willing to share their story. Lots of us support someone with Combat PTSD too. Ask as many questions as you like.

AND Take care of yourself - do something nice for yourself each day.

Sisu

 

[Izzy]

Thanks Sisu. I've been reading a lot of the boards on the supporters section. Looks like there are many other members with similar experiences.