Without anxiety, what motivates you?

[Strangelongtrip]

I've come to a realization about myself, and I wonder if others experience the same thing. Most of my life I've been motivated by the immense anxiety of perfectionism/what ifs. The only reason I did things was because the anxiety surrounding them was so bad that when I did them, it went away. For example, with school I've gotten good grades because I motivated myself with anxiety--if I don't do this this terrible thing will happen. The only stop to it was when I felt depressed--it was a break from the pressure I was putting on myself, which partially caused physical illnesses. But now that I can keep my anxiety levels down, and I'm in more of a state of calm, I'm wondering what influences and motivates me. I think, for me, it's the pursuit of knowledge and understanding, for both school and possible careers. I want to learn, not just anxiously go through the paces to get some grade. I also want to help others, and if I am calm and at peace, I can come from a better place to do that.

What motivates you other than anxiety?

 

[Ronin]

Douchebags.

... No, seriously. The kind of people that make me go all sort of Yuck, thats sick, man / looking for ways to not have that anywhere nearby.

Right, you were asking internal motivation, not external weirdos...

Knowledge & skills & improvement. In, fixing all the long lists in my head where I just dont X enough.

 

[Sideways]

From ACT - values.

What are some of the things that I really value at my core? For example: friends, being fit, helping others, looking great, reducing waste, animals and their welfare, and on and on...

Doing things because they align with your values will oftentimes make the activity itself more meaningful and enjoyable for you.

 

[TruthSeeker]

@Sideways I also am motivated by my core values (love of art, music, and writing), honesty/integrity, personal responsibility, and my love for teaching.

things that motivate me: having fun and appreciating my talents; art, music, poetry, and writing. I have been doing a lot of art lately-totally destressing, am involved in a music group and we play for the elderly at retirement homes so that motivates me to practice, and I have a little online business where I sell things I write and my poetry. My dock is under repair and I love to fish.....and next year go crabbing and shrimping! I love to ride the tractor and cut my lawn-it's one of those jobs that I can see a difference in. I love to teach and I'm writing stories and teaching materials, teaching another retired teacher how to start her own education business, and teaching my neighbor to plan an instrument. Getting motivated around the house....a little harder cause it's just me, but I'm redecorating-using my strengths-artsy craftsy talents. I guess feeling confident in my strengths reinforces my behavior enough so that I choose fun things to make, create or do. Traveling is a big motivator....and I reckon I could go just about anywhere ....so I'm working on that too. Self-care......I like my hair dresser and a pedicure once a month......they both feel good and that's reinforcing to get me out...and if I'm heading downwards....its really reinforcing.

Then there are those things whose motivation is from a negative consequence.....failing to pay the bills (negatively impacts my credit and it's even more annoying to get multiple messages about something I forgot to pay), not following through on a promise or commitment (I'll feel bad if I don't), procrastination....wigs me out, getting medicine on time...a safety thing if I don't, doing the taking out trash, doing dishes (can't stand the bugs and the smell) and doing anything against my value system (will cause me guilt).

 

[Gs172003]

That's a great question! I should really think on that!

 

[Anij34]

I think that my motivation is the desire to learn. I'm a bit of a history buff and love learning...even if its not something I'll really USE the process of learning motivates me forward.

 

[grit]

What an interesting topic!

I use anxiety to filter who is giving me paranoia in my head and try to solve that problem...that is the only positive thing that I attach to anxiety - I am very bothered by a person and I need to learn why or I am super worried about something and usually it means, for me, I am avoiding a relationship rupture with a person. I see thinking about my therapist often when an anxiety is creeping upon me...so I sort of associate my anxiety more with other's interfering in my psyche.

I do not use anxiety to motivate me at all...I use my strong appetite of learning to motivate me. I want to know, learn, know the truth (even if that is elusive), be kinder and more compassionate (how and how)....I am so motivated how do I become a better person tomorrow for me and for my family, friends and the society...( I am getting older so I think) what can I do for the world my legacy my memory....

I use anxiety to check the engine though...there is a culprit somewhere...

 

[TruthSeeker]

I think that my motivation is the desire to learn. I'm a bit of a history buff and love learning...even if its not something I'll really USE the process of learning motivates me forward.

I use intellect and learning two ways....one as it interests me just for the info itself and.....another not so popular.....as a defense.....I work at not doing this-happens when I'm threatened....or meet a new T.

 

[Lionheart]

Love, (self and others) Inner-peace, Spiritual growth, Comfort, Balance, and improving the quality of my life as much as possible. These things motivate me.

 

[TruthSeeker]

@Lionheart777 Yes, they do me too. Balance and peace r biggies!

 

[Strangelongtrip]

These are some awesome answers ?

From ACT - values.

I had to look this up and it was very valuable! I was surprised what my top values were, but I suppose I'm in denial that they aren't "making lots of money" when that's the motif of my family's value on things haha. I value creativity and self improvement above all else!

I use anxiety to filter who is giving me paranoia in my head and try to solve that problem

My therapist drilled into me that anxiety is a messenger to what I need to work on or what I need to address! took me a while to accept that, but working WITH it is so helpful!

I use intellect and learning two ways....one as it interests me just for the info itself and.....another not so popular.....as a defense

This is interesting, and I do the same thing when triggered. I need to learn as much as possible to "protect" myself. Which is why I know so many terrible facts about terrible things haha.

Inner-peace

This struck me. The other day, I had to tell myself I couldn't give myself justice, but I could give myself peace. This is sort of way for me to feel slightly better lol

 

[TruthSeeker]

These are some awesome answers ?


I had to look this up and it was very valuable! I was surprised what my top values were, but I suppose I'm in denial that they aren't "making lots of money" when that's the motif of my family's value on things haha. I value creativity and self improvement above all else!



My therapist drilled into me that anxiety is a messenger to what I need to work on or what I need to address! took me a while to accept that, but working WITH it is so helpful!




This is interesting, and I do the same thing when triggered. I need to learn as much as possible to "protect" myself. Which is why I know so many terrible facts about terrible things haha.



This struck me. The other day, I had to tell myself I couldn't give myself justice, but I could give myself peace. This is sort of way for me to feel slightly better lol

@Lionheart777 "I can't give myself justice, but I can give myself peace....thanks....a really simple self message when I'm spinning over injustice issues....thanks.