Work, School, Home, Family, And Finances--vent

[Kintsugi]

AGH.

The long and short of it:

I started my new semester about three and a half weeks ago. I am only taking one full class and getting two credits for a class/internship combination to graduate. My internship requires a minimum of 40 hours total, but the internship that I got is for 20 hours a week, starting my second week of school and stretching till nearly the end of the semester (I think I have two weeks open at the end).

My internship is fantastic. It's exactly what I want to be doing. In my best dream, I work my ass off there as hard as possible this semester in the hopes that they will hire me. I get to be a part of a nationally distributed magazine doing writing and copy editing along with other duties. It's wonderful.

BUT

I was looking forward to this semester because I felt it would give me the light schedule I needed before stepping into the Outside World after school. I was hoping to continue my concentrated rehabilitation of Self and to continue my investment in healing and practicing what I have learned over the summer to help with my symptoms/behavioral problems. With 20 hours at my internship, class responsibilities, anticipating how I will survive after school, and PTSD, I'm starting to crack. My fiance came home from being in China for 3 months barely before the start of school, and I'm still readjusting to his return. I have a family wedding coming up that I have to deal with not going to, and I'm stressing hard about what I'm doing after graduation.

I've been very aware of my mental health and stress levels, and I've been putting coping strategies into action left and right, but the stress is getting to me much more than I'd hope. I put my behavioral issues in check whenever possible, paying particular attention to feelings of aggression that I know arise from stress. But my uncontrollable symptoms seem to be getting worse as I focus more on tasks at hand and much less on myself and my health.

I don't know how to balance myself and regulate my stress. I've been considering starting a morning or evening routine for relaxation/invigoration/"me time," but I really don't even know where to start. Does anyone have any coping strategies or other suggestions? Words of wisdom? Particularly effective grounding techniques?

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

I don't have much time...but I wanted to say the little I can.

Having a routine with regular 'me time', has always been my life saver. Regular sleep helps a lot too.

I pace while listening to music. That seems to ground me and realize some stress.

 

[The Albatross]

Schedule in your self care time...I call mine an "hour of power" It can be more if my schedule permits, but I center, ground and balance every morning (now how successful I am on a day to day basis may be another matter...) but by building this into my schedule (I chose mine first thing in the morning almost before I am coherent)... whatever the day brings, I get another shot to try again tomorrow same bat time same bat channel.

 

[The Albatross]

Just didn't see any self care in there. It's easy spiral off and ignore something so very basic, and even at good times seemingly inconsquential ... til we crack. You've got some wonderful things happening ... invest in yourself every day... you and what you are accomplishing are worth it.

 

[Kintsugi]

I think the fact that committing to a self-care routine causes me stress may further point to the reality that I need more self-care time in my schedule. :D

I should probably set something up where I go out regularly with my dog. I can't bring her to work with me, and I've never been away from her for so long on a regular basis. But I get to bring her with me tomorrow (special circumstances)!

I think the fact that I am allergic to exercise during the school year may also be a problem for my stress...