Wow, I Just Have A Big Problem With Crying

[John25]

I can't cry, only recently I have started to cry myself out, and it helps a LOT, but I feel a shamed. I realize that it's stupid, I just never cried a lot, like that song 'Boys don't cry'. I think it's the link between loosing my father who meant a lot to me, and the realizing of what pompous idiot he was and all the mistakes he did in our family life.

Now I just cry sometimes for both...

 

[safenow]

John, it is good to be able to cry. It helps to clean out the system. I never cried until the night my children were kidnapped. Then, I couldn't stop crying. I grieved for 48 years for my babies. Every year on thanksgiving I cry 24 hours, then it is out of my system, and I can function again.

During the years people tried to stop me, I got sick. But when I locked my self in my home and refused to let anyone in, I got well. Probably doesn't make any sense, but for me it worked a miracle.

Cry when you need to. It is healing.

Just my .02

 

[Ayasha]

I understand how you feel, John.

My father never allowed me to cry much so I didn't learn how until recently and still when I cry I feel ashamed and weak. Father has always said that crying makes you whiny but I have learned that isn't true. Crying makes you human and it shows you are in pain somehow, and you have to let that pain out no matter how hard it may be.

As Safenow said, cry when you need to because it is healing. It is very good for you, and I don't care if a person is male, female, transgendered, etc. because admitting you can cry and allowing yourself to do so makes you a much stronger person in the end.

I hope this helps, and that you feel better soon.

 

[NarcSis]

I can understand the whole not crying stuff, I had a real difficult time after my trauma because all I did was cry, now I'm one of those "emotional" people who cries at movies, when I feel nostalgic, weddings, happy things....it just never stops. LOL

Seriously though, in terms of releasing pain, when I cry, I feel like I wouldn't stop for days....it's been 5 years since my trauma and I can still cry for hours at a time when the internal pain / stress gets to be too much. I am so tired of crying now even though I know it needs to come out. I guess in a way, I keep falling back to the belief that I should toughen up and stop crying.

It's a really difficult belief to challenge when it's so ingrained in us. I'm just saying, I hear you and here's my shoulder if you need it. :hug: