You Know You Have PTSD When...

[ChildofGod]

When you must always sit somewhere and the need to watch all exits and everytime you walk through your own parking lot, you must always look for danger.

 

[SeekingAfrica]

When a normal every-day problem to most people (like your computer breaking down) sends you on a survival spiral of thinking that makes you feel like you're in a nightmare or living a double life that no one else gets. And that feeling ends up lasting for days, making you feel like a low-functioning much dumber version of yourself that can't concentrate at all.

When the idea of going to a seamstress that will need to take measurements from your body makes you feel like you'll faint.

When the idea of dancing in couples for dance makes you sick with fear.

When someone adjusting your body for certain dance move makes you see black. (thank God I'm over that one)

When random words make you completely space out of a conversation- or out of a whole day. One moment it's a regular day, then someone says that word and it's like you're dropped in a different reality.

 

[ChildofGod]

Your OCD is really bad, has been for years and isn't letting up anytime soon. (I have germ paranoia and stuff like that)

 

[Friday]

Aaaaargh. There is absolutely no reason to have to expend this much energy trying very very hard not to get very very angry about something that was over and done with years ago. :banghead:

 

[zaniara]

Not funny, but the real shit:

When your 20-something son for the seventh time wonder (with desperation and despair in his voice) how on earth you could ever even think he would stop loving you or see signs of that (even though he really have been very egoistic, despite not seeing it himself) just because he hasn't taken time to see you for quite some time. (Me not accusing but simply saying during talking about it all that if he would want some day to cut ties I would grieve but have to respect it.)

He really can't understand or wrap his head around how I can not trust the love and connection to last a lifetime. We come from such different angels. I am so grateful for the people and love in my life, but I know everything can be taken away. It's just a fact for me. Not for him?

I don't understand his despair. I was just speaking of the matters of the facts. And also he acts as if he is pretty angry with me with old stuff and brings stuff up, but when I say that we should talk about it for real he says it's only me being stuck in the past and that he doesnt suffer from it..??
(= So much consequences after living with PTSD and being a mum simultaneously for all those years.. ?)

 

[Mach123]

I had a little OCD thing today. I've been thinking about making a post on how I save receipts. It just got to be a real thing and I kept thinking "just do it month by month and chuck them." And "I use cards for every purchase and I don't need them."

I don't but today I spent a couple hours looking for a recipt from last week and I don't have it. I had ended up with boxes of envelopes with literally years of receipts even for macdonalds and parking at my therapist appointment.

Even now I called the store and since I used the store card it's no problem I can return (the item that made me start looking for it) but I'm so careful and I've been doing this so long I just can not believe I can't come up with it.

The good news is it's over. I hope. I don't need them. I just threw out about a years worth. But it really upset me. When we moved last year I threw out about five years worth but I brought a bunch with me as well. I had everything. Every single recipt but that ONE. (I new there was an item on it I might want to return so I stuck it somewhere). Oooooh, it's killing me!

I don't need them. Don't save them. Don't save them. ???

 

[ChildofGod]

When you have to keep your anger in check but it's hard.

 

[Mina]

When you switch chiropractors because the new facility yours is so excited about having moved to is one giant open space.

 

[ChildofGod]

When you can't shower or bathe for a long period of time, because it's trauma related. (I can't wipe my hands on bath towels anymore, having been using paper towels at home for years now. )

 

[Ronin]

... And when you measure recovery, trust in yourself and others, and assorted things by how much / where / under which conditions you can bathe.

Throw me into ice cold river in the winter and :inlove: good time, with some.
Not only no, but hellthef*ckno, in any universe, :mad: :locktopic: other times.

 

[ChildofGod]

... And when you measure recovery, trust in yourself and others, and assorted things by how much / where / under which conditions you can bathe.

Throw me into ice cold river in the winter and :inlove: good time, with some.
Not only no, but hellthef*ckno, in any universe, :mad::locktopic: other times.

Thank you.?

 

[jaccat]

When, yet again, you are saved from serious injury by your superfast reflexes. By the time that falling stack of crates landed where I had been standing, I was half a metre away with no idea how I got there.