Platitudes?

[Deleted member 33052]

I'm curious. Recently, I read a comment from another member criticizing comments that were platitudes rather than helpful advice.

I've always assumed that even if I don't have anything useful to say, then saying something kind is also helpful. I'm feeling a bit self-conscious now, because I'm not sure if my platitudes are a waste of keystrokes, and possibly an annoyance. If that's the case, I'm fine with it - I just like to know what's expected of me.

I'd be grateful for input from anyone... Thanks.

 

[Sideways]

I think you're right on the money. Sometimes there isn't often much constructive stuff that can be offer, but saying something kind, or even just "I get what you're saying" is a big deal. It can be pretty isolating, and sometimes just knowing people are out there connecting with you in some way is important...

 

[ladee]

Always speak from your heart and experience... and if someone interprets our words as platitudes.. well, others will appreciate the kindness and support.Win -Win as I see it.

 

[EveHarrington]

I wouldn't worry so much about this other person. Anthony made a post/reply recently about how this forum is full of all different kinds of people with all different kinds of approaches. It's what makes this place great, TBH, right?

Sometimes I post feedback that's directly related to the post topic. Sometimes I just give words of support.

I know all too well what it feels like to put yourself out there and be afraid that you won't get any responses. It can be terrifying! I much rather post words of support for someone that let them know they're not alone rather than let a post just languish out there all alone.

Sometimes I notice posts that just sit there with no replies for a day or so. I can recall a few times where I replied simply in support and after that the post took off and the person was able to get good feedback. What if I didn't reply? Maybe the post would have continued to go unnoticed.

I think you should just continue to do what you've been doing all along. :)

 

[Justmehere]

I agree with others - and I think you can let the other person take responsibility for communicating what is helpful for them and what isn't. Be true to yourself and let others be themsleves and own their responsibility to communicate for themselves what helps, and to pass on what doesn't help.

For what it is worth, which I know may not be much, but I think you have great stuff to say. I personally don't mind platitudes - sometimes there is very helpful wisdom in them, and sometimes it helps me to read genuine kindness in a moment of confusion and despair. Sometimes it helps me to know someone is listening as much as what they have to say.

For me, sometimes simple listening without all the answers or with statements of kindness can be a greater help than all the advice in all the world.

 

[Tinyflame]

You can't get more-alone reading anything (except for something abusive or member-attacking/ not acceptable within forum guidelines) than ptsd leaves us feeling frequently, already. Especially if it was likely difficult to post for the person, for all you know. If you tried to be supportive that was kind. I think as @EveHarrington said, the worst-feeling response is no response.

 

[ladee]

I don't feel that when we offer someone support, that it is a platitude. I used the word in a post to someone and said I didn't want my post to be a platitude that rang hollow.... is this what you mean? Am I being paranoid here ???:nailbiting: :)

 

[Deleted member 33052]

I don't feel that when we offer someone support, that it is a platitude. I used the word in a post to som...

No, and yes. :D

 

[ladee]

Whew... I wasted a paranoid episode ???? :nailbiting::nailbiting::nailbiting: I don't want to get 'too' healthy, apparently.... Thanks for the answer, I can stop breathing into a paper bag now.... close call, this one..:laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh:

 

[mary1979]

You're one of my favourite posters @Mal Content.

If I see a notification with your name I KNOW that what ill read will be uplifting and/soothing.

You get the tone around here after a while and to know the way different people support.
Some practical, others nurturing, and those who are blunt but mean well.

And some people are here because they want to be told how it is, while others require patience and care.

Dont stop being you! Every ptsd site needs a Mal Content xxx

 

[ladee]

Absolutely @mary1979, what would we do without @Mal Content !!!! Don't even want to think about it.... Glad you are here Mal... :hug::hug::hug::hug::hug:

 

[EveHarrington]

@ladee it's ok I had a wasted paranoid moment the other day myself! Thank goodness all was well and I was worried over nothing. :hug: