It's ok. trust me there is NO WAY your abuse is any more extreme than things they see everyday. EVERYONE there has LONG history of severe unspeakable abuse. I know your abuse was terrible I'm sure, but sadly your case in not unique, it's very common, and your history is MORE of a reason TO admit you rather than to reject you.
Everyone there has histories very similar yours, myself I was abused in all ways possible... in foster care, then by adoptive parents, then by a youth paster, then assaulted several times in college, then abducted assaulted in every way possible and nearly killed. I was dissociating, passively suicidal, epically depressed, and self-harming when I was admitted.
Most have had suicide attempts, myself included. I don't know if they have ever transfered anyone, my guess is it is extremely rare, it's just in the handbook that in theory they can.
But they have a SO level for basically 1 to 1 montioring if you are physically unsafe, so you CAN be actually suicidal with a plan for on the unit and you'll stay on TDU. It's expected that there are some safety issues and that OF COURSE you can't handle it outpatient, thats why you're coming there.
I don't know under what circumstances they would transfer someone but my guess is it would be pretty extreme (like repeated violene towards another patient, or if you nearly killed yourself on the unit more than once or twice, like REALLY almost died, and did it in a way that other Pts saw and were affected, that would be my guess) I know I was suicidal several times on the unit and collapsed on the floor in sobs nearly shouting at the mental health work how I was going to get out of there and then (insert ver detailed, doable suicide plan). many self harmed on the unit, myself included, and literally nothing "bad" happened other than talking about what was going on when you did it and what you could do differently with you therapist. So self-harm and suicidality is dealt with and even expected and not a reason to not admit you or to transfre you.
It took me 3-5 weeks (can't remember b/c I lost time) to finally get admitted, and I think thats fairly typical. I think the process is just slow and they often have a short waitlist. AND I know they were short handed in admissions when I was there, not sure if they filled that slot...so that would be another reason it takes a while.
try to relax. try to remember it's a HOSPITAL they see cases like yours everyday, they're never shocked, and sevre symptoms are more of a reason to get in, not less.
